Need serious help (suicide attempt)

This “new age” of unlimited access to pornography at any time is really fucking fascinating seeing the petri dish we’re all in as men and the effects that have arose since its start. The very similar effects to one another. Brother let me tell you man first of all how old are you? If your a young guy in his 20s like me then I’ll start off by saying you were literally just an innocent naive little guinea pig who fell for the depraved vice that is the porn of this era we live in. Its taken advantage of your incessant natural sexual desires that have always been there in men since beginning of time but with a sinister twist by having enticing images and sex every where you look at your fingertips. The culture we live in today is so sexually stimulating even if you put your phone down for a few days and just go outside you’ll still see some type of soft core vanilla damn near close to straight up hard porn sometimes either way on tv billboards music whatever. But your problem is the result of pmo bro. Regardless of how weak you may feel right now, I still see you as much stronger than me since i was in your same position i got hooked on pmo then eventually escalated into trans porn which in turn and it still makes my stomach knot to type it out or think about it at 19!!! i actually went and saw a ts escort. All i got was head from a fucking dude in a mustache wearing a wig and some womens clothing, i got catfished really cuz it wasnt what i saw in the pictures beforehand and i was too scared to just turn around leave which my heart was beating to do so the whole time. But this fucking chemical addiction that takes over your body overrides any type of rational left within you. Dont off yourself man because i almost did the same. I tried to od i had thoughts of crashing my car, ive had these very sick thoughts man. But you gotta move on and somehow find it in you to separate yourself from the experience and realize its always you who has the power to change or do whatever it is you want to accomplish. I hope your doing well right now man dont let this evil orwellian babylonian state we live in now win. Take back control and power of your life. Check out my profile and the posts ive made on my story with all this Im sure it’ll help put some things in perspective for you man. You’re not alone. God bless.

 

We all were there, we all just wanted it to stop already, its hard to live normal happy life when you know you have problems your friends and family dont know about and even no one of them actually had em in the first place (or at least you think so). Being ashamed,guilty and confused all the time is not gonna help but we all feel like that at least sometimes. I was depressed at one point in my life and it sucked, I was hopeless, but then I just decieded Im gonna change my mindset and the way I think (of course it sounded like a horsesh*t and I wasnt that much into it but I have had enough), I started convincing my self that Im worthy, pretty, charismatic, respected and full of positive energy. That actually started to work pretty fast but later on I learned its called Law of Attraction. And really, but fr, from kinda lowest ranked guy within the guys I was going out with I become kinda alfa (i wasnt beating people up or anything it just happened), I constantly had like 5 girls DMing me (I also wasnt PMOing for month/two), it was hard for me not to cheat on my girl (i was unfaithful because I never had those things before so i got carried away). Later on I started using it daily and improving my life, at 1 point I started with some bad thoughts and insecurities and I downgrade my life so much once again (it happened when I realize I have ED problems and that Im an addict) and my life fall apart. I started using the same strategy and mindset again lately and results are coming pretty fast again, I wanted money I recieved more money in last few months then in last few years, my d is getting bigger and Im making more friends. Give it a try, maybe its all coincidence but I told my friends about it and they have some success with it to. Research about it and believe me just try it, I know its easy to say things like this and that it looks too simple. But believe me it is. Sorry for a bit longer answer and best of luck.

 

If you can get erections by the thought of girls (which many guys including myself wish they could do, but cant!) then I assume your body is fine and that the issue is just psychological.

The trans thing you mentioned are homosexual tendencies from porn, porn isn't real life. When you watch vanilla porn, after some time you don't get excited and you move on. The shock keeps you hooked, you maybe got shocked by trans porn and now you think you may like it, but you know you actually do not.

This can be fixed brother, personally I haven't related to it so it's better to search about HOCD on this forum, many people have shared tips on how to cure from it. Please do not let temporary issues cause you an irreversible action! HOCD, ED & any other sexual issue is reversible, suicide is not reversible! I personally had ED and after some months of working on it, it is become much better.

Stay strong brother you got it!