What do you think?

I would venture to say that it is just as enjoyable, if not more. You're more mature, both sexually and emotionally. Of course, attitude is a large part of it, too. Each relationship is new, and there is excitement to be found in the exploration of a new person and a new relationship.

 

...and "thank you" for posing an interesting question, and for being so candid about your concern. I suspect you aren't the only one. I know I was. Well done.

 

Mid-thirties.

 

I'm 37 and a virgin and it's a major concern for me. Not just emotionally, but sexually.

 

I think it is possible the odds of getting in to a relationship are lower due to lack of experience, but then again if you only need one person then that kind of puts it in perspective.

It just depends on the two people and their dynamic, and if it works it works. I have no interest in fitting in to the mainstream or really find that to be very attractive these days. I can maybe get away with someone a bit younger since I look young for my age, but I don't see that as improving odds much because personality wise I think there's a really good chance it just won't work.

To be fair though some younger people are fairly keen and aware, after all we have this whole group where people know about and work on this issue so that's a good sign. But I just can't totally compartmentalize sexual relationship as if personality and everything else doesn't matter.

Put it this way, for the non-generic human it always needs to be specific anyway so no, I don't think it's about age even though that contributes to it a bit.

 

It's constantly on my mind too.

 

my dad found my mom when he was over 30 years old, it's never too late

 

I didn't have a girlfriend in high school, either. I dated, but nothing serious. I just didn't want to commit to anything like that while still in my teens. It didn't make sense to me.

When I was in my twenties it made more sense. But I was in the military, and it was pretty easy to "hook-up", which A LOT of guys did. Admittedly, so did I, but not nearly as much as some of my buddies. That frustrated some girls, because they just wanted to jump me and that was it. And then there were some that were really attracted to me because of it, and one in particular that I started seeing. And get this, we barely started becoming serious when she got orders and was shipped off to another base. I was ready and willing to make love before she left, but she didn't want to have sex before marriage. After the military I was too busy trying to find out what I wanted to do with my life to be in a serious relationship...I was moving around a lot during that time. But the notion that I should be in a relationship by now, and even married by now, weighed on me.

I was twenty-nine when I had my first "real" relationship. She didn't feel that we needed to wait until marriage to make love, but we both wanted to wait until we really got to know each other. And that's where the emotional maturity really came into play. And I believe that emotional maturity played a big role in making our first time together incredible.

I guess the long point I'm making here is that waiting, whether by choice or not, is not such a bad thing.

 

Same. I wasn’t popular in high school, so I never got looks from girls. It was always the athletic clear skin guys that got attention. At the time I thought it wasn’t a big deal because I have college and my twenties. But, after all these years, I still don’t have a girlfriend, virgin, and I have never had a first kiss. Adulting is hard.