The Lord of the Rings Challenge

day 15

I'm no longer an Uruk-hai as of today. Thank You Lord. I am a hobbit now, and I have left the Shire for Bree, with the ring of P(M)Ower in my pocket. You all here are my Fellowship. Thank you for all the encouragement so far.

I'm in the process of starting to move out of my current location, and it is quite tedious lol. One day at a time. Hope you all are well.

 

Yeah... I already forgotten that 8 o'clock was the hour. It's 9 now, but I'm here. A decent start

 

Chekcing in day 36,

All good, urges are completely gone

 

end of day 2 ... this was a hard one"!

 

Good reflection. Do you think mind can show any situation from the point of view it finds beneficial or excusing for the belifs we have?

Candy? ...You've already made a choice...

 

Checking in day 163.

 

Day 115

Today I am joined by Shadowfax, the Lord of all horses!

I missed the gym this morning and felt absolutely dreadful, completely sapped of energy and motivation, as the day went on this subsided but I’m curious as to what brought in on.

Urges aren’t much of an issue at the moment, but the gym is becoming a new source of temptation. I went along this afternoon to make sure I got my exercise in and my eyes kept getting distracted; I didn’t linger or go back for a second glance which is a plus, but I need to make sure I can ‘switch-off’ better when exercising to avoid any urges.

 

Day 3

I went today to the office. I felt right, the first time since the beginning of the pandemic that the whole team is at the office.

Stay strong!!

 

Day 435

 

Checking in briefly, doing well, just wish I wasn't quite so busy this week and had got to bed earlier the last couple of nights. We still have far too much going on with our remodel and other family events.

Thanks for your comments, and glad the longer reflection post was helpful @stronaut2021, @yogiguru, and @newbobido.

 

Evening of the 38th day.

 

Sheesh, I didn't realize how many days I had failed to visit this thread. Might have something to do with why I reset yesterday...now I've got one clean day under my belt. Soon that will be many more. We're gonna keep going. Hoo hah!

Cause of reset: ignoring the warning signs, keeping myself isolated, only following the first half of my action plan.
Idea to help next time: Finding a healthy source of dopamine such as a walk outside or a book.

St. Mark the Evangelist, pray for us!

 

Day 263

All my life had this problem, and today comes back knocking my door... I've been trying to fix it the last couple years but I don't know if I can or how to fix it yet...

I'm talking about the way ppl see me, my way of being makes them treat me like a "pushover" or like a "good guy" in the bad way. Like a dull, dumb good guy..

I really don't want to let Pigmalión effect take place with this shit anymore you know? And I don't like the idea of "overreacting to some BS to defend my dignity" like if I were in highschool. Idk why I have to do that while most ppl get their social dignity just by being themselves.

Anyway I end up saying I don't give a fuk about this, it's not like I care that much about ppl who treats me like that. But it does hurt whenever it happens. You feel discriminated.

 

Day 15 complete

I am having thoughts about sex with my wife this morning. Hard to let go, because it could be reality. But no one is benefiting from these thoughts, so I shall stop.

 

Day 8, today was a hard day, i suffered a lot of social anxiety. That feel that you dont form part of the same group. The good thing is that im not an orc anymore lol

 

Day 14 today, last day as a Uruk-Hai

 

Day 47

Tired from work. Haven't been feeling like posting as much as I used to.

 

Day 5 - Orc, The Dark Tower Barad-Dûr

 

Day 3
This day is going to be one long boss fight…


Had a fight with my girlfriend about money, so I didn’t sleep enough last night. Long story short, now I’m kind of tired and sad and I’m in a position where one of my most common anti-fap moves is to sit at a coffee place for long hours. And now I can’t even go there because of the fight until we figure some stuff about our combined budget.

At the same time I have a job interview tomorrow and I’m super nervous. I haven't had a real steady job in over two years because I’ve decided to make a career change just before Covid hit… and that is part of the reason that we are broke.

So ya… one long boss fight of a day.

 

Day 428 no PMO.