Told long distance gf about issue now she isn't talking to me

At least your being honest... Most mend don't cave about an addiction until it becomes worse. She may be protecting her self rom you from the thought of you doing it, what I can say is just be patient and give her space if she doesn't message you back she's obviously disturbed by it or trying to sort out thoughts about you.


In all aspects if she has real love and loves you unconditionally she will rationalize and try to help you. Give her space brother if it's meant to be it'll be meant to be.

 

Things are always better in the sunlight. Give her space. If it doesn't work out it doesn't work out.

 

What was your motivation for telling her?

I personally connect to several parts of this, including telling a new gf that you used to look at p. And including looking at escort listings. And being a virgin. And not touching p after I got that gf. And being Christian, and getting my first relationship around 24 yrs old.

I'd also suggest that if you did feel it was necessary to tell a gf about p (or they asked), that you do it in person, so you can say, "it was so foolish of me, I regret every minute of it, and wish I'd never seen it. I don't want to look at a girl that way".

 

Don't beat yourself up too much about wishing you hadn't gotten the addiction. Many of us are dealing with it. It's so unfair really how the Internet is able to expose young boys/men to things they aren't ready to see. It hooks us. The good news is you've identified the issue and want to try and fix it!

You'll find good support here from people who often understand what you are going though.

 

Bro, as someone who’s done this I’m telling you stop. You have no way of knowing if she’s started talking to another Man.

 

LDR aren't easy. I was in one and my ex blocked me from calling and messaging her without warning. I will admit the relationship was on the verge of ending, but to block someone without saying anything is quite low IMO. That's the thing with ldr, it's so easy to avoid having difficult conversations. You have to really make an effort to make them work. My impression is your gf feels uncomfortable talking about this sort of thing or doesn't know what to do with the information you gave her.

 

Seems like it. Something like that happened at the beginning of the end of my relationship. My ex became quite cold in the way she interacted with me. Amazingly we stayed together for a further 6 or 7 months after she changed but I should have ended it sooner. By the sounds of things, you went into too many details when talking about your addiction. My ex didn't like it when I gave too many details about this sort of thing. She wanted honesty but not too much honesty. It really hurt for a few months after my relationship ended but I eventually got over it. Looking back I'm glad it ended because we were no good for each other. So it's not the end of the world if your relationship ends.

 

Don’t second guess this too much. You were honest and it didn’t work out. Use this as partial motivation to go harder into giving up your addiction. Do it for yourself, but let the pain of the past (this) motivate you.
I know you’re grieving and this hurts so much. Keep working on yourself and you will be fine.

 

I'm sorry man.

 

Welcome to the cruel world of dating.

 

Sorry. Harsh experience.

 

You might take some time to analyze your feelings on this comment. The way I read it you may be somewhat shirking a little blame off yourself. It obviously was something that turned your gf off from talking to you and will be in the future if you don't do something about it with other girls. Your not a bad person, but maybe this is the start to the motivation you need to make a change for your future relationships?

 

It can be quite a shock when they suddenly change. My ex went from being fun, friendly and affectionate to being extremely formal in texts. I've heard some women need to feel a relationship in order to enjoy it.

 

I also voluntarily brought it up to my girlfriend at the time and she had a tough time with it.

I thought I had to bring it up. My mom had seen the internet history and said "tell her if she asks" (from what I remember).

You want the best for her. If you meet your goals and stop looking at p and searching for escorts and become the man you want to be, does your past matter? If a woman asks, tell her the truth, but I'm not sure you should volunteer it.