What's Your Reason?

Early on it was curiosity. curiosity kills here it did. But now its easier I could go out get rejected or just stay home. But the last few years I have been biting the bullet and talking to girls but I'm always missing that little thing and people say I'm awkward so I'm hoping quitting will make me less. But really part is lonely mostly its habit and its always easier to follow a habit then to break it so. But I started when I was so young I even wanted to quit when I was young. I started when I was 11 and now I'm 18 so 7 long years wasted. But hopefully I can get away from it.

 

Simple. Sexual dysfunction. I lost my virginity a little over a year ago. Since then I've had sex about a dozen times and every single time it has been a lesson in humiliation. Only recently did I finally wake up to the fact that my pmo addiction could be the main culprit. Now my desire for a healthy sex life far outweighs my desire for instant pmo gratification.

 

I've been struggling to find a reason to kill it for good. I think my lack of a solid, meaningful reason AND my repeated crash "binges" are leading to very hazy priorities. I am not black/white enough about this. Suggestions welcome!

 

We're here for 70 years and then we're gone. I want to make each and every second of those 70 years mean something.

 

The question of the "big reason" is a really good one.

Of course there are so many smaller reasons - better relationships, mood, confidence, proper sexual function, living up to your own values, not participating in the abuse and exploitation of the models etc. etc.

For me though the big reason is about living MY life, making MY choices, behaving the way I choose, being free to live up to MY values, holding MY head up both in my own sense of identity and in not having anything to hide.

The alternative is living like a zombie controlled by something alien and destructive. It's about life - MY life and YOUR life. When you're free you can make choices for yourself, invest in relationships, speak out against the destructive power of pornography with integrity and hold your head up.

So the question I ask myself is whose life do I want to live? Whose agenda do I want to follow? Who's writing the script of my life? Me or some creepy guy with neither integrity or scuples who claims to be a legitimate businessman but in reality is nothing more than a drug dealer?

Put that way, for me the choices are pretty clear...

Does that make sense?

 

Some inspiring words on this thread

For me, it's the only choice. The only path I can take. The addiction was tearing me up inside and this is the only way I can be rid of that demon.

What's the alternative? Being alone? Getting locked up? Death? NoFap gives you a life worth living. Something worth fighting for

 

Stop being an slave. Thats the way i feel about PMO

 

My reason was because I had watched so much porn I got porn inducted ED. I think for a while I was in denial and tried to make excuses, but it wasn't until recently I realized that it was from the porn. I have only been clean for 4 days but plan on staying clean and porn free for as long as I live.

 

My reason is simple:

I don't want to go to hell. Oh, and the fact that God forbids masturbation/pornography too. Note that to me, God is the meaning of perfection and good. So if perfect goodness says its a no-no, then its a no-no.

Its really hard, but I joined this community to get some help whenever i have the urge to rub one out.

 

I didn't realize till a today that the reason for my great first year at school was my lack of internet and lack thereof masturbation. Today I realized it and decided I want to get back to that version of me that was better.

 

Yes it does make solid sense. It hit me deep to read it. Thank you

 

Thank you FapsALot - glad this connected for you. Here's to your life and mine!

 

Very powerful message. Thanks a lot for sharing your insights.

 

I don't have a big reason or goal guiding me at the moment, but I think about it a lot and even though I can't put it into words, I feel like it's important just to ask myself "why am I doing this" and imagine how I will feel when I reach 30 days. Even though I have no specific reason, I still feel weirdly motivated by this.

 

I like this post some much, thank you for asking this. You're totally right, we need a reason to this. My reason is to be a better person, stop objectifying women and pursuing my dreams not surviving through life but living it. Peace.

 

A few reasons for me.

About a month ago I had a one night stand in what I consider to have been one of the most emotionally difficult years of my life. When we got down to it, I could barely get it in her for about a minute before I went completely flaccid. Tried three separate times...nothing doing. Meanwhile, the entire time I just felt dead. I knew what I was supposed to be doing and how to make her feel, but I just was emotionless.

I thought I was impotent. Wondering what happened, I ended up stumbling upon yourbrainonporn.com and got educated real quick, realizing that my heavy use of porn the last 8 years was causing ED. It wasn't just the ED I was bothered by though. For the last 8 years of my life I've felt aimless, directionless, and just downright depressed. The one exception was right before I graduated college and decided to give up porn and masturbation for a period...felt like I was on top of the world, and had a FWB for about a month. The rest of that period I've felt not as smart or fast as I used to be, like my brain has been operating on first or second gear for the longest time.

Worse, the only steady relationship was a 2 week fling with a girl I met studying abroad. I never felt confident talking to women mainly because I always ended up looking at their "assets" before paying attention to them. And I know they could sense this in me. One person in college even described me as "asexual" at one point, I've even been called, yes, "creepy" once. That was another low point for me.

For myself, I'm doing this to get my life back and to make up for the years I've wasted with this shameful habit. I don't want to objectify women any more and just treat them as pieces of meat. I want to feel a real F****** connection with a woman for the first time in my life. I want to replace this crap habit that wasted an hour of my day and would put me in a fog for the rest of it, and I want to put that new found energy to good use in cultivating productive habits for myself. Maybe this way I can finally get on with my life and feel like an adult.

Beyond myself, as a teacher, I hope in some way I can teach my male students to take control of their masculinity before porn wrecks their lives. I also want them to realize that the women in their lives are mothers, daughters, sisters, cousins and, most importantly, human beings just like themselves, not just pieces of meat to be oogled at or conquested.

 

I'm on here to quit porn for good. The addiction had crept up on me and had manifested itself in brain fog, chronic fatigue, moodiness and ever extreme tastes in porn. My work performance was awful and I just couldn't focus. 3 weeks in I already feel much better with a clearer head, more level moods and I think I am just a nicer person now. Not sure about quitting fapping for good but i'll do 30 days and then another 30. So glad I found this site!

 

And another reason is that I just don't know myself without porn. I have used and fapped almost daily for longer than I care to remember, more so since the advent of broadband and tube sites. So it's a journey to get to know the real me!