So I'm consistently making it to 6 or 7 days but I keep relapsing. I should know by now that no matter what, if I do it once in a day to even something a little more mild I'll end up binging a little and escalating. There's a definite pattern to it. I think I've partially identified the why part of it too. First is this deep drive to 'test' if things are improving (PIED). I've got to know if thats going away (and it does seem to be slightly improving). The next part is that i think subconsciously I'm making up for the lack of a partner. I noticed a relapsed easier if I had thought about dating again earlier in the day. The other thing I noticed is that if I end up relapsing old fantasies I'm trying to rid myself of come back. If I do it once later in the day I do it again, but usually to more hardcore stuff. Even if I'm repulsed by looking at stuff, when I end up back 'in the moment' I drift back towards stuff that I'm trying to get rid of entirely. I have to keep my end goals in mind and I need to find a way to stop worrying so much about the ED. It's when I think about it too much I run into problems. That's about it, just needed to type my thoughts out.
Best advice i could give is to substitute old patterns with new ones. Patters come in short ranges and long ones too. This pattern is 6-7 day pattern and you need to replace it with a different 6-7 day pattern. Also dont even look at porn cuz if you give it a second it will take you'r day
