Alone Is A Fools Paradise

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Let The Good Times Roll, Feb 13, 2020 at 9:23 PM.

  1. Let The Good Times Roll

    Let The Good Times Roll Fapstronaut

    I’ll get to the point. I’m an introvert. I’ve never really had many friends throughout my life. I’m in my second year of college now, my friend group from elementary has pretty much split, they are going to other universities, moving out of state, etc. So I find myself alone.

    Now that I am not hyper focused on porn. I find myself painfully alone. Yet I can’t muster up the energy to talk to new people. Even when I find them interesting. I’ve attended a few events through my university and I haven’t even really tried to talk to anyone or get to know them. It took a lot just to show up. It doesn’t help that I am an introvert by nature so talking really exhausts me.

    Sometimes I do wonder if I am a bit autistic, or just really underdeveloped in socializing as I have never really been a talkative kid. Homeschooling was great, but damn that did a number on me.

    Has anyone else experienced something similar? I gladly welcome advice and would love to hear your tale, even if it’s ongoing.
    FellatiousD and Mr.Chips like this.
  2. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

    I was wondering if I have Aspergers or stuff the other day.
  3. Mr.Chips

    Mr.Chips Fapstronaut

    I can relate, but the thing is I am not an introvert..which makes this thing a problem from time to time.
  4. Coco99

    Coco99 Fapstronaut

    Yes, I am also an introvert who has social anxiety at times. First thing is to minimize or eliminate porn. Focus on building yourself, going to the library and reading a book for 1 hour is so underrated these days. Go to the gym. Take up a new hobby such as boxing/cooking etc. I am certainly not there yet but I have put myself in a better position. Eventually without you knowing you will meet people
  5. Jeremi

    Jeremi Fapstronaut

  6. Fifth Horseman

    Fifth Horseman Fapstronaut

    Was born and will die a proud introvert, but at this point closer to the end than the beginning and I run meetings, make speeches, feel obligated to fill the gaps in conversation at parties and group get togethers etc. I think what pulled me out of my social anxiety over the years was when I was forced into group situations- traveling with a group (you all start knowing nobody and by the end you have friends), local volunteer and political projects and charity work. You find out that when you sign on to these things you aren’t the only one who has a shell to break out of, that many if not most of the people looking for these things are otherwise isolated and alone and looking, just like you, for confidence, for an outlet. You just have to force yourself to take those painful first steps to join these situations. And yes it is painful, but only to start. The rewards are life-long.
  7. FellatiousD

    FellatiousD Fapstronaut

    My experience is similar, if not worse. I had maybe one or two friends in elementary school, and only for a couple years. It would not be an exaggeration to say that I've never had any friends since then. Most of my adult life has been spent inside playing video games. NoFap gives me hope, though. I go out to practice hobbies like martial arts and I just started learning dancing. It is stressful trying to talk to people and act normal. I don't think I'm on the autism spectrum, but just poorly conditioned for social interaction. It's a WIP.
  8. Let The Good Times Roll

    Let The Good Times Roll Fapstronaut

    Thank you for sharing a bit of your story. So far I’ve just been going to social events where most people would come already in a group, leaving me feeling disconnected from everyone. So you have definitely given me some ideas!
  9. Let The Good Times Roll

    Let The Good Times Roll Fapstronaut

    I feel for you. I was really good friends with my elementary group up until middle school where I opted to go home school. That is what really messed me up, I was already a quiet kid, so I basically isolated myself for three years in high school. I didn’t reconnect with them until senior year of high school when I started going to college through concurrent enrollment. Now we are all turning different pages in the book of life.

    But hey sounds like you and I both, made it through some tuff times! Keep up the hard work the results are bound to be seen.
    Coco99 likes this.

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