Anybody else here feel porn is only part of issue?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by jrob322323, Nov 20, 2018.

  1. jrob322323

    jrob322323 Fapstronaut

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    im socially awkward, im kinda weird, theres times i get caught off guard or dont get obvious jokes, i can be kinda doushy. Did anyone else have overly controlling parents and or issues with peers in school growing up? My mom is strict christian and doesnt care about what anyone wants for themselves only what she wants for them. My dad is a loner and very authoratative. I love my parents but i think growing up they didnt help me how i needed. Often if anything, the ways they would try to help made matters worse. Basically alot of people do not like and are against me and attractive women are always with the crowds of people that hate me. The main reason why i have been reluctant to want to date. Somehow everyone seems to know everyone. I fear people bash me behind my back and try to “cock block” me with few women i do meet. I try to be nice to people but they are rarely nice back. I was bullied, had no friends, girls would even make fun of me too. Its all this bull shit i went through growing up mixed with ptsd anxiety. I didnt do well in highschool because i was so upset with things. I just wanted it to be over. I feel trapped i wanna move on in life but its challenging letting stuff go when who knows what bs will happen next? Everytime i get rejected or sit back and look at how life is going by. I feel inadequate, pathetic, mentally fatigued and just boring in the eyes of women or just people. I really dont like myself, whats happened to me cant be normal. People say learn to like yourself, i say How can anyone like themselves when they had been ripped on all their life and feel the way I do? From time to time, i think. What if i had friends, what if i got to move or change schools, could a fresh start really make a difference? What would i be doing now? If anyone can relate or wants to tell me what they think, i am interested in hearing what you have to say...
     
  2. DGZ

    DGZ Fapstronaut

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    NoFap is a means to an end, not the end itself.
    I swear to you that these feelings will at least diminish if you get a good streak going on NoFap.
     
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  3. jrob322323

    jrob322323 Fapstronaut

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    Thx DGZ, theres times the bad memories and they hurt alot. I wanna move too
     
  4. Nick1918

    Nick1918 Fapstronaut

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    DGZ is spot on , leave the past to the past. Your self confidence will increase in leaps and bounds once you get a few days under your belt
     
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  5. Uncomfortably Numb

    Uncomfortably Numb Fapstronaut

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    Porn has sought you out my friend... you can kick back and get 'clean'.
    Things will start to improve once you put PMO behind you.
    Good luck
     
  6. HybridOwl

    HybridOwl Fapstronaut

    I used to be like this. It's interesting that you also mentioned you can be kind of "douchy". I think there's a lot of interesting resources out there now for nice guys in terms of getting to know our "shadow side". I think for men, being strong and assertive involves really getting to know our shadow side, what we are capable of, and from that point can we truly develop strength.

    I used to want to be liked (and succeeded a lot of the time but rarely felt respected and therefore eventually it often gave way to feeling undermined). As a result, my niceness would give way to passive aggressive behaviour and resentment, in other words, my niceness was only one half of a coin of unhealthy behaviour.

    Now I just want to be respected, first and foremost by myself, for the actions I take in life. I'm not saying don't be compassionate, but it should come from a place of being firmly rooted in yourself and your sense of purpose as a man.

    And yes, I think porn is only the tip of the iceberg, at least in my experience.
     
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  7. VeganRights

    VeganRights Fapstronaut

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    I can relate a lot to that story as well.
    I do believe nofap is crucial for self improvement, but like you say, its not the end of the story. But its a big part of it.
    I have gotten so much help from youtube channel Infinite Waters, just sharing because it helped me so much :)
     
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