Day 4, pushing myself and feeling better

Hi everyone

some of you might remember some of my posts some months ago where I was fighting NoFap. I was hoping to possibly go monk mode or get to 90 days. I am fighting to get past 9 days, the longest I have went without PMO.

a few weeks ago, I decided to give this a try again. I thought "If I play video games, keep myself busy, and engage in activities and acknowledge my triggers and fight them, I will get through this". I went a whole week without watching Porn and I got to day 7 and I broke down. Deep down, I felt this determination to keep on going, so the next day, I went through a reboot, and I did another 7 days with no pmo, but I broke it again on Friday. I realized that my alarm clock was a trigger, and internet was one to. I would look at my alarm clock and worry about my hours of sleep, fearing I would be deprived of sleep, and I have always valued good sleep and if I don't sleep I worry. So, I hide my alarm clock at a certain time, and that has helped me go on further without any issues. However, I want to get past the 9 day mark, and get to 14 days. I need to not worry about my sleep and need to make sure I do certain things to make sure I don't PMO.

I am a jogger, and I am trying to keep myself on a schedule daily. I eat around 12pm, and I try to run between 2pm and 3pm, and I shower immediately, because once I shower, I have less of a desire to PMO. Why? because I am a bit of a clean freak.

I remember when I first tried doing this, I had images of porn in my mind and I couldn't shake them unless I did things to keep them off of my mind. As I watch it less and as I go on farther, I don't get those images, but I still get urges, but I fight them.

Wish my luck!