Does a relationship help PMO-abstaining?

If you are in an intimate relationship with someone, you will lose all interest in PMO, but if you are a big addict now, it will take a while for that to subside. I never had any interest until my marriage began to fail, as did my sex life. If you're enjoying the real thing, you have no need for anything fake.
As far as when they're not around, everyone is different. I know couples that sext each other, if they have to been away from each other and relieve themselves, either alone or video chatting with their partner. They're aren't physically together, but it's the next best thing until they are again.

 

I agree with burningheart & hope. Whats the old saying, "Where ever you go, there you are." Recovery is about the relationship with yourself. Looking outside yourself or using a relationship doesn't work. I know, I've tried. I'm in my 3rd marriage. It almost didn't happen because of my porn addiction.
Today I'm clean. I'm taking care of myself. I'm in the best relationship with myself ever. Because of that that I'm in the best relationship ever with my wife.
My ability to love another is limited to how much I love my self.

 

Interesting topic here! I am in a long-distance relationship for some time already. It is interesting how I actually got to know her just because I was on a 5 days nofap streak or so and I was really passionate because of it. When I see her for maybe a few weeks straight I have no desire to PMO. The sex is so much better than PMO. Usually when I spent much time with her and then go home again, usually like the next day or so I really get a strong desire to PMO and I give in. It seems like a nice change. But it is just nice for the moment. So for me the relationship kinda is counterproductive for my nofap challenge. But I really try to get both things under control. I never was like a very sick P fanatic and I just talk with my girlfriend about everything that I watch, what I prefer and that I do the nofap challenge. I just don't tell her about my relapses. She really thinks that I am on a 3 months streak but in reality it is just 3 days. Maaaan. I am so dying right now. Freakin nightmare. I feel like I am in the movie Fight Club and right now I am at this point where the proganist wants to check out the different self help groups to make his ego feel relieved, to see that there are people beneath him.

 

It definitely suppresses the want for pmo, but your brain is still stuck on that reward system. So you will inevitably move back to old tendencies if you do not work on it. Being in love bolsters an entirely new motivation to removing porn.

 

We seek comfort in PMO when our emotional needs are not being met. Once we get ourselves addicted we rely on it for any kind of emotional discomfort. It is counterfeit comfort and we may prefer it over the real thing. A healthy relationship can help make the desire to PMO go away. Notice I did not say a sexual relationship. Even though PMO is looking at sexual images PMO is more about comforting painful or uncomfortable emotions. A relationship will not make PMO desires go away if the thing that is making you seek porn is external to the relationship. If you seek PMO because of stress or anxiety and that still exists then you will continue to have urges.

 

Yes, yes, yes. My husband was this way. (Although not sure of the chaser effect.) He didn't tell me about his PMO habits because he thought he was past it and/or being married would mean he didn't need it. Wrong. The toxic secret nearly destroyed our marriage and it's negatively affected our marriage and ability to connect on an intimate level outside sex even after he finally told me. 11 years of marriage total, with me in the dark until about 6 or 7 years ago, and I finally have hope for the first time, thanks to FANOS and daily cuddling while we both do hard mode reboot. We have finally both realized our marriage has never really been fully emotionally connected as it should be and we both believe PMO is the root problem. Period.

 

Everyone is different, but I in my experience I think the above comments are not very accurate. If you have a serious issue with PMO I feel that being in an intimate relationship will really do very little to stop PMO urges. A single person just can't compete with the endless variety of content available on the internet. Ideally you really need to determine the root cause of PMO addiction, develop strategies for beating it, and make further life changes prior to entering into a relationship.

 

Yes, when I was in a relationship, I was too busy satiating my ravenous partner to consider wasting time with the pixies.