Finding your meaning and seeking your passions

I've always struggled with finding definite meaning in my life, but since participating in NoFap, I've actually come to find it isn't as hard as I thought. Once I truly discovered who I am and what my passions are, It became so much easier to abstain from pornography. It helped me so much that I actually wrote an entire chapter about it in my book and I want to share it with you guys:


I’ve wrestled with this idea for years without winning a single fight. Purpose? What is my purpose? It’s a universal question that all people ask themselves at one point in their life or another. Sadly, many grope endlessly in the darkness, dying before they find an answer. Death; not in the sense that their heart stops beating, but in the sense that they stop trying. They let the monotony of life consume them, their nine to five work schedule define them, let their television set control them. Why? Because it’s easier to resign yourself from those questions than to answer them. It’s easier to turn in a blank test rather than digging in your mind for the answer. Had I not realized how destructive my pornography addiction was, I would have eventually given up as well. I would have turned in the test with absolutely none of the answers filled in; however, I’ve come to realize something this week. The answer sheet has been in my pocket the whole time. We grope in the darkness, all the while failing to realize that the flashlight is right under our feet. It isn’t that hard to find meaning in your life. Don’t let yourself think that it’s impossible. That is a lie which pornography wants you to believe so it can remain as a festering parasite deep within your soul. Trust me. If I, nothing more than a wan-dering college student which has not only hit rock bottom, but began digging into the sediment, can find purpose, then so can you.

It begins with finding your passions in life. Find what you love, find what piques your interest, and use it to begin molding yourself. Maybe you can take something you’ve been using as an oc-cupant and turn it into a hobby. As I said before, writing this book initially helped me curb my sexual appetite, but it’s beginning to turn into a passion of mine. The more I write, the fuller I am. As my fingers glide across the keyboard, the thought of masturbating to pornography becomes the absolute last thing on my mind. Find your niche in life and make it your initial meaning, whether that be painting, fishing, or playing a musical instrument. Just make sure it is something that is selfless and of benefit to you.

Taking up a hobby that is of genuine interest is important because it’s the initial step of defining yourself. Right now you and I are dried out pieces of clay because we’ve removed the moisture of pornography. Your passion is not only going to replace that moisture with clean water, but it’s also going to be the first tool which helps shape you. As you jog down the golden path of success you will continually pick up tools along the way, but it’s your passion that will remain with you always. Focus on that passion. Let it become the unstoppable force that disintegrates the void, shrinking it into nothing.

Let me remind you that your passion should not become mindless work. Yes, work hard to develop it, but don’t let it consume your life, making you bored, miserable, and tired. That is not the end goal, and if you seem to be drifting away from that, then by all means take a step back and reevaluate yourself. Don’t burn yourself out.

“But there’s nothing in life that interests me. I don’t think I can find my passion.” Again, that is the void talking. Cover your ears and ignore it. Start by attempting new things. You never know if you like something until you try it.

Also, you need to start breaking the monotony of your daily routine. Instead of coming home from your job and immediately hopping on the computer, choose to read a book or work on a project instead. Anything that adds a flicker of difference in your life will help break the monotony. Just make sure you don’t fall back into another boring routine.

Another thing that may help you is making sure to use your time productively. I previously mentioned that one of the worst things to do when breaking your addiction is to waste time on the internet. Idleness in general is enough to fuel the void and spark a flame for sexual thoughts. Stay productive because productivity not only prevents those things, but it can also yield meaning in the process. Try. That is the word which you must repeat over and over in your head. You won’t reach the finish line if you refuse to put your shoes on.

Once you’ve adopted your passion, meaning will follow suit. A lack of pornography coupled with genuine interest is enough to begin molding you into the person you desire to be.


Hope this helps guys!