Frustrated because of this P addiction

Okay so this porn addiction thing really sucks. I feel bad on a psychological level many times because i know i never can watch porn again, i have a hard time accepting that. And my brain is most of the time telling me things like 'is all this effort and hardship worth it? Are you really gonna get anything out of this?' While i know to some degree thag nofap will help me, i watched many educational videos about porn addiction. But still. And whats also unmotivating is that i often come to the realization of how short my streak is. I'm now at a 3 day no PMO streak, and many times during the day i realize how long i have to go before the urges go away and i experience big benefits. I've experiencing many benefits already, given that for the past 6 months my porn use has greatly decreased, but still i'm too obsessed with the freaking number of days of my streak, even though i know i shouldn't care about that. I don't have a clear goal in writing this, i just wanted to share my frustrations.