Title is self-explanatory, for the past 2-3 months all my relapses/slip-ups have been to the same porn model. Just today, I tried looking up negative publicity of this porn model in an effort to get me to detach myself and I guess disgust myself as well. Totally stupid idea because it backfired and I ended up just coming across more porn of her. Fortunately, I managed to get ahold of myself and not relapse. Does anyone else have or has had an obsession with certain porn models? How did you break free from that obsession?
A week ago I cam across a similar question, and my first thought was to look up "[name of model] with no makeup". Most look like completely different people. It is truly astounding. Anything else to humanize her and convince yourself that the person you are PMOing to is actually not a person, but a fantasy created by an actor and production team. Whatever model is living rent free in your head right now has as much effect on you life and the real world as Batman and Bugs Bunny. It may be helpful to set up an internet blocker that blocks not only porn sites but any url or search with her name in it. Could snap you out of the trance you're in and save you a month of reboot time.
I hear you, man. I know exactly how you feel. No magic cure. Stop watching porn. Work at it as if your life depended on it because, frankly, it does. You might need to re-evaluate your values and decide on the man you really want to be. Whatever. Just stop watching porn.
The first week or two is going to be difficult. You will want to relapse. But if you make it a week or more you will change your thinking and create new habits. It’s very hard but possible.
I think it helps to realize this is more of a porn problem in general than the model. If you get over her, you'll probably get attached to another. So i don't know if its a good idea to focus your efforts just around her, because trying to not think about something is still thinking about it. She's just an attractive woman and i'm sure you attractive women all the time. She has no power over your mind in all reality, so don't let them have influence over you. You're better than that just for being on here. I'd say just tackle the issue of pmo in general and your desires for that models material will follow.
I totally agree with this. There’s always something else. It’s about the addiction to those brain chemicals; it’s not necessarily about her. She’s just the latest shiny object. I’ve been there. There will very likely be another one that will entice you. don’t focus on her. Just focus on quitting porn/PMO
This is absolutely true. My 14 year addiction revolved around finding the next perfect star who was of my taste. I never escalated to the bizarre genres or fetishes, which is the usual case here. For me it was always the actress. I have looked for stars from every decade possible. And my whole stash was of different porn stars and not genre specific. So just quit porn. Don't think of it as specified model case.
I can relate with you very much as I have been in the same place before. Only that I have been addicted for much longer than few months. One thing that helped me was to de-objectify. By that I mean acknowledging the truth that she is a human being, somebody's daughter or wife. Just another person with their own imperfections. A human being. Acknowledging the humanity of another helps us to embrace our humanity within. Another thing is to realize is that whatever the model is doing is not because of their love or sexual interest for you, but to encash your attention which will pay their bosses who in turn recruits more models to get your attention and the circle goes on..it's a vicious cycle. Most of these models get lured to and stuck in the industry. It is highly unlikely that they agreed to do whatever they do because it's their passion. Many of these women's insecurities were taken advantage by predators and pimps. It is much more likely that they got trapped or coerced into this position. By idolizing the model, you are infact, living a big lie, a lie which you are led to believe as truth, a lie thrown at you to hook your attention, to monetize you...a sane rational man can never think of wasting his time or energy over some pretentious lies! It is impossible and stupid thing to do! So wake up from the delusion. Objectifying screen itself is a stupid waste of energy and time. Slay off lies. Connect with real people. And please consider changing your user name. Everytime you read it, you are going to reinforce yourself that you are a suicidal addict or something. Please consider changing it if you really want to really break off from that identity. Take care!
Looking up 'real lives' of porn models will not help you forget about porn. Watching porn videos won't help. Looking up pictures of pornstars, whether flattering or otherwise, will not help you forget about porn. Wipe your history, find a new hobby and get away from the computer.
Like many have already said, treat the more general problem of getting over the obsession of porn. All of us have our particular preferences when it comes to porn... you have an obsession with a particular person, I have an obsession with a particular fetish. Whether it's a particular person, a fetish of some kind, or even simpler details like hair colour or age group, all these obsessions are just how the deeper problem of a dependence on porn manifest themselves. Deal with the issue at the root of the problem.
She's become like your girlfriend. It might sound corny what I'm about to type; but maybe you should "break up with her". Like find a picture of her (in clothes) and say to her something like "this relationship isn't going to work. It is time for me to move on". Physiologically this might help who knows. You should try this too
I had a similar problem. Mine was for five years or more. What stopped that particular addiction was the model getting a bad facelift, and I lost sexual interest. I’m so grateful that happened because it was so liberating.
My recent relapses where caused by this.... I was like okay lemme just check on instagram how my favorite star is doing, peeking at the pictures and I wanted more..which led to watching P again. Fuck this toxic shit man we gotta fight against this drug