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How to Start Conversations with Strangers?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Deleted Account, Dec 20, 2017.

  1. Is anyone good at having conversations with strangers?
    What is the best way to start one?

    An hour before work I wait in the small airport near by. Sometimes I listen to podcasts, have something to eat and sometimes buy things in the shops while I wait. But last night I wanted to start conversations with people there but felt too scared to do so.

    I think it would be good for me to do this since it will help get out of my own head and maybe even make someone feel good. Personally I would love to leave everyone better than I found them.

    Any suggestions about how I go about doing this.
     
    vibemaker and A41:14A like this.
  2. For what purpose?

    If you want to make friends join a club, group etc. Most people are just going about lives in day to day basis and busy. I.e. Not looking to make friends. I can see you're 33 so school or uni isn't an option. Work may be. Otherwise join an active club, something you enjoy and see what happens.

    Are you lonely? You don't have to make conversation with strangers. It isn't essential. Good luck anyway.
     
  3. Karimtolstoi

    Karimtolstoi Fapstronaut

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    You can find something in common whith the person you want to talk with. For example, you see someone who is listening to blues music and you like blues too so you tell him/her :" hey that's bla bla bla I love that song" or you just ypu love the way he/she dresses so you tell him/her " Nice shoes!" And you keep conversation till you both find a comfort zone.
     
  4. TruChange

    TruChange Fapstronaut

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    Start off talking about a non-personal topic. This has to be something external - their shoes, their bag, the book they're reading, their dog, etc.

    From there you let the conversation grow to more personal topics as the other person gets more comfortable.

    If you start with something personal off the bat, you'll get the cold shoulder.

    It's a difficult art, but worth it.
     
  5. Buy them a beer.
     
    Deleted Account and Kenzi like this.
  6. lamstronger

    lamstronger Fapstronaut

    I think I could talk to strangers easely, just that most people are either on their phones or listening to music, so it wouldnt be possible to start a conversation
     
  7. i find the weather or other outdoor observance
    to be good to engage people with. might also be
    article of clothing, some detail in the present environment
    you both can connect with.
    maybe ask..hey is that an iPhone 6 ya got there lol

    iam not a naturally extroverted person.... it takes practice

    ive come to really enjoy those random conversations. never know who
    youll meet or what you may learn. never underestimate the power
    of how you may positively affect someone.

    always find its good to smile to try and put people at ease.
     
  8. GeneralismoKilgore

    GeneralismoKilgore Fapstronaut

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    It can be difficult especially if you haven't got a lot of experience in doing it. It will take some motivation on your part. So things that will help you with conversation starters.

    1) Treat it like it's not important. If the conversation last for four minute and then dies, so be it. If it lasts for five hours then dies, great. Consider each conversation a learning opportunity, of meeting someone you didn't know before, and probably will never speak to again. There is no cost in starting the conversation, and you lose nothing by doing it except maybe a few minutes. (Great way to chat up girls.)

    2) Don't forget to smile. Not like a Ken doll or a psycho, just remember to smile at the end of the asking the first question or item. It shows your friendly and you mean well.

    3) Sometime it can help to make an observation, jokes about a particular situation often work well, and most of the time it gets the persons attention without being directed to them. Sometimes people will ignore it just because they are not used to interacting with people, but don't sweat it, address them personally and they will usually realize what your trying to do.

    4) Conversational starters. The old boring ones are weather. Don't start with that, unless it is something that is significant, like the roof is caving in because of this storm, etc. Try and find something to start with that will immediately grab attention, and don't say it as a stand alone sentence. Sometime situations can help, like if someone is reading a particular book, as them about the book. Airport is great because it gives you the opportunity to ask, about travelling, make the conversation geared towards them, what they think, what they feel, people are more receptive to genuine interest paid towards them.

    5) We're like old friends. Depending on how the conversation is going talk to the person like you would a close friend. They will also perceive this and talk to you like a close friend. Psychologically this person will start to like you, because the brain perceives friendliness and openness, and associates positive feelings with this.

    Good luck bud, try it on some of the tellers in the airport, if you feel to awkward for direct approach, the more you do the better you get.
     

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