I came on too strong

Hi I am female. Honestly, if you were the last person to send a text and she has not responded, I would move on. It’s her turn to text you. Did you come on too strong? I don’t know I was not there. Maybe she met someone else on tinder and decided to date them? I used to online date and this happened all the time. I would have a great date and be constantly texting then all of the sudden ghosted or nothing. I do think you are too invested in her, and should not put all your eggs in one basket. Get back out there and date other women. I know it is hard particularly if you have ever dated offline but this is just how things are these days. If someone stops talking to you you just need to let that go. You likely will never hear from them again and you will never know why. I have friends dating men for a month or more and then disappear. I do think if you text her again it will come across as desperate. So my advice let it go and move on. Plenty of fish in the sea.

 

If it's her turn to respond, then wait for her response. Don't ever double text. Just don't. If she keeps ignoring you, move on. Don't text her again. The ball is in her court so let her decide whether she wants to play it back to you. Meanwhile, start looking for other people to date. Focus on something else otherwise you'll end up coming across as desperate and needy and very few women find that attractive in a man they barely know.

If she responds, reply within an hour. Don't wait days. Always respond with high enthusiasm but same level of investment. But don't wait several days as that gives her mixed signals. You can show her interest by responding in a timely manner and avoid coming across as desperate by NOT double texting and letting her reciprocate at her own pace. Meanwhile, date other people.

 

Agreed. This is unfortunate but it’s the ways of dating today. You gotta roll with the punches. And I will add that when the right person does come along it won’t be this tough and there will not be game playing. I know because it happened to me. One day it will just click into place and you will know what I mean. With the right person you won’t have to force it or agonize over it. It will just fit. And often it’s the wrong person due to timing in their lives or yours. I used to get these guys that I went on one date with who clearly thought we were going to get married. They would text over and over. Personally I always had the courtesy to tell them I was not interested. But often times that resulted in a series of additional texts about how I was wrong and how we were meant to be. I felt bad truly. I often took the time to explain how online dating worked and to not get discouraged. But I do understand why women ghost. Because they just don’t want to deal with the anger many men show when rejected.

One of the men I dated quite seriously that I met online told me a good story. He was divorced and 40 had never done online dating. He met a girl fairly early on and they went on three dates. They texted daily and even planned to meet up again and then all the sudden no response. It was like she fell off the face of the earth. At first he was concerned that something had happened to her. But then as the days passed and he looked at her active dating profile he realized that she was indeed ignoring him and he got pissed. How could she not at least say she’s not interested? What did I do? He left several messages and angry texts. Then he spoke to another guy friend who explained as I am now this is how it is. Then he felt stupid and embarrassed and sent a text apologizing to her. She did not respond probably blocked him by that time. But it’s a good story to retell as it’s a great example. Did he do something? Unlikely. She likely met someone else or got serious with one of the 30 other men pursuing her online. Maybe she got back with her ex? You will never know but th best advice to quote princess Elsa “let it go let it go.”

 

You are way over analyzing this situation. It’s a lot simpler than you are making it. If she was interested she would text you. If she has not texted you she’s not interested. I don’t know why or what happened but she’s just not. Don’t waste your time fighting to be a part of someone’s life. There are plenty of people who want you in theirs. Don’t waste your time.

 

over calling and over texting was a big mistake I used to make along time ago , I have lerned if she is interested she will call you or text you back you never know what she got going on if she likes she will get back in touch with you if she isn't she will not

 

(I’m going to sound like an old man here)

This is the problem with all this texting you kids do these days. You miss ALL the subtle cues you get from IRL conversations and even talking on the phone. You can’t get context or subtlety from texts.

Wait for about four days. If you haven’t heard anything reach out again casually. “Hey, how are things?

She’ll either respond or she won’t. If she doesn’t, time to swipe left.

 

I would proceed with caution and skepticism. It’s likely she’s going to do what she did to you again. Most people on tinder, truly on most online dating but tinder specifically have a rotating list of people they see and they are ever adding members to it. So it’s like who is free tonight? Joe? Tom? Bob? No one? Let me get back on tinder. If someone takes a long time to text you there is usually a reason. Also people that bail on plans or make them last minute. Huge red flags. If someone is interested in you truly interested they make time not excuses. I work 60 hours a week but the guys I’m interested in I respond to trust me. Just go in with your eyes open. There is the rare individual for which this does not hold true and I hope she’s one.

 

@SorryWontSayIt Glad she hit you back.

 

Sounds like your improving a lot in the dating game don't chase women if she is interested she will make it easy , Good Job on the improvment

 

Hug her first. Kiss later on the date if it feels natural.

 

hey man how is it going? i kinda have the same prob but she is my ex ''girlfriend'' .... what is going on now?

 

Great to hear you had a good third date! Congrats. : D