But the thing is, right now, I have my heart set on working hard to become more social (to be fair, I guess a lot of people are now that we’re in an indisputably better place than we were in April 2020). That’s really the one area at this point where I feel that my life is suffering. Time to organize my Meetups and my schedule, and struggle to find other people in my city who have the same hobbies as me. And attend these REGULARLY, instead of just once every few months like I’ve been doing. Find at least a small group of friends who like the same thing, and maybe find a girlfriend in the process (still little to no additional luck in that department for now, which is also why I have online dating on my to-do list for the end of the summer...my weakness is shyness and lack of knowledge on how to flirt, and catch on when women are flirting with me...bcuz they actually do, but I keep missing it because of my ‘tism). I’m not planning on treating it as a mission of any kind, it’s just kind of a “whatever will be will be” type deal. But a more severe struggle is probably self-esteem. I’m deliberately dedicating this time to not only doing NF, but also not devoting ANY more time to feeling sorry for myself (completely sworn it off...this, to me, is Priority #1. Then NoFap.). Additionally, I’m taking a course in copyediting and proofreading, and am hoping to gain at least entry-level skills to either be employable in that kind of job market, or to further this self-employed business that I’ve technically started. Yup, I’m now a freelance writer and proofreader. But the catch is, there aren’t any clients or any money involved at this point, and I wanna save that for when I gain experience. Now the business is either being used for study, or to write the series of plays I’m working on. On the other hand, as far as NF is concerned, I’ve been struggling quite a bit more (the porn addiction has actually graduated to a sex chat room addiction—needless to say it’s been difficult, and I wanna get the fuck off of it). I actually did go to one SAA meeting, but to be honest, that didn’t succeed in doing anything but creeping me out, especially when I heard a couple of these other mens’ testimonies. So I haven’t been back. Still, that’s the reason why I have these goals to cast more of a wide net and broaden my horizons. To beat these addictions.