I will recover, won't I

My story is long and sad, like many others. Unfortunately, the addiction to pornography and masturbation got hold of me in early adolescence. My first sexual relationship was with a sex worker in my early twenties, yes, unfortunately, I paid for it. And I failed with her. After that, I was devastated and didn't understand what had happened; I couldn't feel any pleasure in my penis. I downloaded Tinder and started chatting with various girls, went out with some of them... after a lot of talking, I had sex with some of these girls, and the surprise was that 'I couldn't maintain an erection, I could even penetrate, but my penis would go flaccid.' I met the famous 'blue pill' (Sildenafil) or it can be called Tadalafil, and I started using it; my penis became as hard as a rock. But that penis wasn't mine, and besides, I didn't feel any pleasure (yes, even with my penis erect and hard as a drill, I could penetrate the girl, but I didn't feel pleasure, except for her. Not to mention that I could make her tired, and I got tired too, not to mention the symptoms from taking this medication (runny nose, body aches, accelerated heart, cold sweats, yes, several symptoms that those who took it know how it is, for those who haven't, Please, never take this medication IT!)); the pornography addiction had already destroyed me. Anyway... Today I'm 25 years old and I feel devastated, as you can tell. On October 23rd, I went out with a girl and we went to a motel to have sex; the surprise was that I couldn't feel pleasure, my penis even got a little hard, I could penetrate, but I didn't feel pleasure, and my penis went flaccid again, I hadn't taken anything for an erection. The girl asked if I was gay. I replied, 'No.' She then asked, 'You didn't like me?' I said, 'You're wonderful' (literally, the girl is 1.56 meters tall, has a beautiful face, straight hair, a very pretty mouth, speaks well, intelligent), so I told her everything (that I was addicted to masturbation)... I said that I was addicted to pornography and masturbation. She said she would try to help me somehow; she is 22 years old, but she has already read something about it. TODAY I've been five days without ***ography and masturbation... I'm going to start counting the days for the famous 90-day brain reset. Let's see if I can do it and if I can save myself from this. I blocked Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, ***ography, etc... today I just read and go out." "5 days without masturbation.

 

Unfortunately, today I lost the girl I almost loved. Now I'm alone. Just updating: it's been 6 days without pornography and masturbation!

 

It's 7 days without masturbation and sexual visual stimuli. It feels like a truck is passing over me.

 

8 Days

 

Thank you for your tip, I am extremely grateful! Know that you've motivated me!

 

It's been 10 days today! 10 days without using social media (Instagram, TikTok, Twitter, Facebook, etc...) and without masturbation! Lots and lots of gym and training! FOCUS!

10 days

 

12 days, no social media, no Tinder, no visual stimuli. Lots and lots of gym. The feeling is terrible, it feels like you're falling into depression, very sad. However, I feel stronger, more energetic, more disposed, I can think better

 

Yes, I conquered 13 days! Today marks 13 days without disturbing my brain.

Of course, I have the urge to relapse, but I won't. I'm occupying my time working. I'm helping to dismantle an old house that was on my mother's property... and when I'm not there in that old house tearing it down, I'm working at my regular job and doing overtime.

I'm feeling very motivated and eager to do things; I can feel my brain getting better and more thoughtful about positive things.

 

14days, nothing to declare on this day, I can only affirm that I am feeling very well every day.

 

15 days. What I can say: a lot of disposition, little tiredness, animation, I feel stronger. Little desire to relapse.

 

16 days

 

17 days overdue. Yesterday, at the end of the day, I almost relapsed. But I stayed strong... I am vulnerable, unfortunately, but I won't relapse. I am very focused on the 90 days... On this day, I am already stronger and more focused. Today, I ate well, went to the gym, did skincare, and ate well. Let's keep going.

 

about my 17 days..

I tell you, what's really breaking me is the addiction to visual stimuli. And I can say one thing, and I state it emphatically! The best thing I did was getting rid of Tinder, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and all social media with visual triggers. Otherwise, I would have lost already. Is it harder? Yes, definitely, but I'm sticking to it.

 

It's what happens when I try to access any social media platform.

 

Exactly @StolenStethoscope . What I think. Everything that is within reach needs to be done... I'm still very unwell, really unwell. A deep sadness.... I believe that as the days go by, this will pass. Every day there's the desire to relapse... but I won't! I will stay strong. Thank you, let's go for it!