Is anybody here a 'psychological homeless'?

You know what I mean?

You may have a shelter to sleep, an ability to make a living, and a regular job (with some good colleagues), yet in every long holiday season e.g. the upcoming new year's eve, you'd always feel painful and lonesome, watching people joyfully going back to their hometown, having a reunion with their parents/ relatives/ kids, none of which is in your life anymore.

I hate the long holiday like this.

For those of you who are not familiar with this kind of loneliness, you may try to relate to it via Mr. Abagnale's speech at 23:34 - 24:00 from the link below:



I have been quite well-adapted to it, though.

 

Yes, I know this feeling is kind of dangerous that, if not being mindful of it, it could stir some negative actions, for which we will later feel regret.

Anyway, thanks for the recommended video. I have already watched that video recently. In fact, I have listened to many of those speeches (I like the voice-tone of the narrator, though I previously mistook as the voice of Denzel Washington), especially ones that included the Dark Knight's theme in the background)

Particularly, his video below is my favorite:



It would be even more encouraging when followed by listening to the song below.



Cheers!

 

Finally, I have found the positive side of this kind of loneliness. Thank you

 

I've invented such a term myself, thus feeling relief that you guys can relate to it. I mean, even any kind of comment/reply from someone could remind me that I am not alone in this hellish state of mind. Someone have been (or currently being) there, too.

I am also grateful that NoFap has included this 'Loneliness' forum in the website.

BTW, I'm glad that you have decently managed to live through those past 12 years.

 

I feel sympathize for you. So for what it is worth, below is the thread I demonstrated briefly about the background of my life.

https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...-defaults-it-is-impossible-in-my-case.142684/

https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...-of-reboot-with-some-help-of-medicine.144812/

As of present, it's been 24 years since I had a conversation with my living mother.

I know that we should not feel better to hear that somebody's life is worse than ours, but you are welcome.

 

Thank God that you have a genuine faith in your God.

As a deep-seated atheist, I have no divine entity which I can turn into or used as a substitute for love.

I have been trying to 'love the angels instead' like Robbie does, but so far still find none.

 

I was born in the Buddhism culture. Although, due to the deviated ritual of this religion, I was not personally much into it at first, but after I turned 30 several years ago, I started practicing Samadhi(Concentrated meditation)/ Vipassana (Mindful meditation) until I have come to the conclusion that....well...it would be safer to say that I have realized how our lives, the world, and the universe happened, thus becoming an atheist.

In this respect, please take it as only another opinion whereas mine could be wrong.

 

Such a feeling is multi-folded, and yes I have been asking myself almost every minute, due to my introvert nature.

Surely, two main reasons, by which such a feeling occurred, are;

1) My inner insecurity due to the unconscious memories about my traumatic childhood. To make the long story short, the source of my insecurity derived from having a quarrelsome mother who is still alive and trying to ruin your life whenever she has a chance. You know, when the person who should be the most secure sanctuary for your life turned out to be the opposite, your mind will never be at peace as long as she is still alive.

I do not want to get into much detail, but just in case someone come up with the old cliche i.e. 'No matter how bad she is, she is still your mother', I would like to give a hint that my mother is 10 times worse than Eminem's mom.

2) The withdrawal symptom. I have been trying to withdraw from some prescribed medicine regarding my ADHD, and consequently it might have partially contributed to this feeling of depressive loneliness.

 

I respect yours as well bro. In fact, I am even a bit envious of you.

Being an atheist may seem voluntary, but it's not. As a consequent, every minute of my life is on the verge of destruction. Last night, the feeling of insecurity was so strong that while I was shivering inside, my body was actually shaken, too. In the past two weeks, I had to deal with it every night, starting from dusk til dawn.

Thank you.