Just completed 90 days - here's my Top 10 Tip List
- Thread starter scottfree
- Start date
Excellent thread, this.
I love the "progress is not linear" line. I totally agree that it comes in waves; it's a reflection of life, really - it ebbs and flows. The trick as you rightly say is to change our approach to the thoughts that arise. They are just thoughts, they cannot control us.
Mindfulness is great for this, I would urge anyone who is struggling with compulsive thoughts to check it out.
I love the "progress is not linear" line. I totally agree that it comes in waves; it's a reflection of life, really - it ebbs and flows. The trick as you rightly say is to change our approach to the thoughts that arise. They are just thoughts, they cannot control us.
Mindfulness is great for this, I would urge anyone who is struggling with compulsive thoughts to check it out.
scottfree
Fapstronaut
One more shout out for K9 P blocking software.
Just wanted to post about "active" vs "passive" triggers. The other night I was restless and in a temporary funk from the day, and I went into a "passive" mindless search on the internet. During this search, out of nowhere I did some key words searches that in the past would have led to P. Well, K9 saved me once again, as the key words were blocked in Google - blocked from the start of the trigger! Just seeing the blocked "K9" page was a reminder to me of where I am and where I could be if I am not attentive to my thoughts and behaviors. This to me is an example of "mindfulness". I needed to me reminded to be mindful of my thoughts and internet searches.
Now, at that exact moment of this search I had a choice to go hunt down the k9 password or just walk away - which I did. This situation to me is the most insidious example of the dangers of the web. Before the web, this mindless behavior might have been using a remote control while watching TV - clicking from one station to the next. But TV in the 1990's and 1980's was nowhere near as dangerous as what is now available online. I can't reiterate this enough on this thread. This type of material available so causally in our homes is NOT natural. We shouldn't be able to just passively click to hard core P. For cable you have to become a paid subscriber to watch adult content, but for the web you just type in one word and every sordid thought and fantasy is there waiting to trap you. As I told my accountability partner, you have prostitutes, the pimps, and all the evil energy associated with this industry waiting for your in your bedroom. Let's block it! It is that simple.
I am thankful that I have k9 and I am over 100 days. As I have said before, my higher self installed this system in my computer. The urges to go there are getting weaker, yet old patterns can still surface. If we can get the porn blocker installed, then these passive triggers will be less of an issue when they do surface.
I'll keep you posted on these thoughts and progress. Stay Strong. Namaste. SF
Just wanted to post about "active" vs "passive" triggers. The other night I was restless and in a temporary funk from the day, and I went into a "passive" mindless search on the internet. During this search, out of nowhere I did some key words searches that in the past would have led to P. Well, K9 saved me once again, as the key words were blocked in Google - blocked from the start of the trigger! Just seeing the blocked "K9" page was a reminder to me of where I am and where I could be if I am not attentive to my thoughts and behaviors. This to me is an example of "mindfulness". I needed to me reminded to be mindful of my thoughts and internet searches.
Now, at that exact moment of this search I had a choice to go hunt down the k9 password or just walk away - which I did. This situation to me is the most insidious example of the dangers of the web. Before the web, this mindless behavior might have been using a remote control while watching TV - clicking from one station to the next. But TV in the 1990's and 1980's was nowhere near as dangerous as what is now available online. I can't reiterate this enough on this thread. This type of material available so causally in our homes is NOT natural. We shouldn't be able to just passively click to hard core P. For cable you have to become a paid subscriber to watch adult content, but for the web you just type in one word and every sordid thought and fantasy is there waiting to trap you. As I told my accountability partner, you have prostitutes, the pimps, and all the evil energy associated with this industry waiting for your in your bedroom. Let's block it! It is that simple.
I am thankful that I have k9 and I am over 100 days. As I have said before, my higher self installed this system in my computer. The urges to go there are getting weaker, yet old patterns can still surface. If we can get the porn blocker installed, then these passive triggers will be less of an issue when they do surface.
I'll keep you posted on these thoughts and progress. Stay Strong. Namaste. SF
mundocorde
Fapstronaut
Thank you for this! I'm just on my 4th day, but "chugging along"!
It's true, meditation (and self-awareness; mindfulness) is an awesome tool!
It's true, meditation (and self-awareness; mindfulness) is an awesome tool!
being_me03
Fapstronaut
hii everybody,i actlly joined nofap a few days befor . i ws pretty confidnt after joing it dat dis tym evrythn will go ryt..i hv tried a lot befor olso bt i hv failed .well i hv strtd again bt i hv a prblm dat in my initial days of stoping it i m vry confidnt bt as days passes my desire olso rise to PMO .i m actlly fed up of ol dis.i wnt a new life !! well ur tips r really gud i vil follow them bt if u cn giv sum mor ideas n tips to me den i vud be vry thankful to u.
scottfree
Fapstronaut
What are the consequences of "MO"?
Someone privately emailed me this comment/question: I have to write to you again, as I have surfed the web a lot and have read about the consequences of "MO". Some say that it has actually no harm while others say that it is harmful for the body. I do not know what actually it does to us. Should it be completely stopped? Well, I know I have to leave this practice, but being aware of its real consequence will help me in a better way. Hoping for a positive reply. With regards, thank you.
Here is my comment back, based on my own experience and philosophy.
The issue with M and O is that it over-stimulates the mind, the chemicals in your body, the lower chakras and energy, which can cause a male to become like a dog that is always in heat. Perpetual hornyness is not a normal condition. Instead, one wants to be poised and calm and to be able to act and re-act as necessary to internal and external surroundings. It is time to treat our sexual energy as sacred and akin to the divine energy and force that created the universe. M and O can become highly addictive because the brain begins to crave the dopamine reactions. You "get off" but this is short-lived, and over the years, is ultimately not healthy. It can lead to sexual issues and habitual, compulsive thinking due to a weak will. (Think M, MO and PMO addiction.)
During this period of humanity, suggestions are everywhere to M and know your body, etc. But, these authors don't fully understand how potent the human body, mind and soul is. Or, they fully understand and do not want to see humanity evolve. Nothing should be wasted particularly not your seed or energy. At the same time, one internally needs to feel this need for change. Let me know if this resonates with you. SF
Someone privately emailed me this comment/question: I have to write to you again, as I have surfed the web a lot and have read about the consequences of "MO". Some say that it has actually no harm while others say that it is harmful for the body. I do not know what actually it does to us. Should it be completely stopped? Well, I know I have to leave this practice, but being aware of its real consequence will help me in a better way. Hoping for a positive reply. With regards, thank you.
Here is my comment back, based on my own experience and philosophy.
The issue with M and O is that it over-stimulates the mind, the chemicals in your body, the lower chakras and energy, which can cause a male to become like a dog that is always in heat. Perpetual hornyness is not a normal condition. Instead, one wants to be poised and calm and to be able to act and re-act as necessary to internal and external surroundings. It is time to treat our sexual energy as sacred and akin to the divine energy and force that created the universe. M and O can become highly addictive because the brain begins to crave the dopamine reactions. You "get off" but this is short-lived, and over the years, is ultimately not healthy. It can lead to sexual issues and habitual, compulsive thinking due to a weak will. (Think M, MO and PMO addiction.)
During this period of humanity, suggestions are everywhere to M and know your body, etc. But, these authors don't fully understand how potent the human body, mind and soul is. Or, they fully understand and do not want to see humanity evolve. Nothing should be wasted particularly not your seed or energy. At the same time, one internally needs to feel this need for change. Let me know if this resonates with you. SF
scottfree
Fapstronaut
Day 107 – Observations
- Whenever I think that this is easy, it’s not. Something comes up shortly after I have that thought where I have to test my will and remain strong. This occurred during the 90-day reboot and remains true today. NoFap is really all about strengthening your will power. That's it. When you exercise your will, it gets stronger. When you don't, it gets weaker.
- If I run across a trigger, it seems to take a couple days to work through my mental/chemical system. This is a perfect opportunity for me to “be the observer” and to see how mind and body act and react to stimulus. I am even observing how external stimulus and body chemistry can impact my mindset, emotions and dreams.
- I feel like I am going into the direction of “maintenance” mode – where I need to remain alert, my will remains strong, and I have to be conscious of my thoughts and actions. Yet, the road feels much smoother than during the 90-day reboot.
More to come… SF
- Whenever I think that this is easy, it’s not. Something comes up shortly after I have that thought where I have to test my will and remain strong. This occurred during the 90-day reboot and remains true today. NoFap is really all about strengthening your will power. That's it. When you exercise your will, it gets stronger. When you don't, it gets weaker.
- If I run across a trigger, it seems to take a couple days to work through my mental/chemical system. This is a perfect opportunity for me to “be the observer” and to see how mind and body act and react to stimulus. I am even observing how external stimulus and body chemistry can impact my mindset, emotions and dreams.
- I feel like I am going into the direction of “maintenance” mode – where I need to remain alert, my will remains strong, and I have to be conscious of my thoughts and actions. Yet, the road feels much smoother than during the 90-day reboot.
More to come… SF
What are your best practices for meditation?
T
toxicbunnies16
Guest
awesome stuff. I hope I can get to your level.
scottfree
Fapstronaut
Thank you for your query Mijereah. I have found that, like NoFap, I could not “go it alone” with meditation. A spiritual path “found me” and it has been the primary foundation and support for meditation and learning to go deeper within my own self.
If you are open to a sincere spiritual path that will help you become who you ought to be, pray, research and wait. The right path for you will appear.
Consider the opportunities when they arise. Use your intuition. Give the practice some time so you can feel the results. Be open. Practice. Learn to dive deep through one spiritual practice or system so that you can master it.
Meditation supports and builds your willpower and concentration. NoFap does the same thing. They work so well together and they are part of the best of all of us.
SF
SBoy49
Fapstronaut
Great stuff, Scott! Thanks for the reminder that you have been posting. I fully agree that sexual energy is sacred. It is often tempting to use it for less holy purposes such as masking feelings or taking away pain. When I got to 120 days, I did fully understand how potent the human mind, body and soul is.
(Obviously I have blown it since then.) When at that point of understanding, I was afraid of my own power, and aware of what relatively mundane circumstances my mind and body are in. It was kind of underwhelming.
I intend to get back there. I am going to make it to 90 days starting right now. Thanks for all your help.
immanuel.iitd
Fapstronaut
if you forgot the password k9 will send the temporary password to our email. so I created a email with unknown password. After installed the K9 software I deleted the unknown password also. The the next time if the K9 send the temporary password to my email. Which i cannot access an more. because i do not know the password.
scottfree
Fapstronaut
“fap” or “NoFap” builds on itself
The following is a quote from Vivikenanda (1863-1902). This brief statement about thoughts and actions is very powerful and worth sharing. It relates to this process of self-evolution that is started from the NoFap 90 day challenge. This is very much like nature – we are never static and we are either going up or down. Either we are moving closer to our goal and who we ought to be or we are moving further away from becoming that person. There is a line here that I found particularly powerful “You will be like a machine in the hands of your impressions, and they will force you to be evil.” This is really what we are up against on this journey. Without working hard on who we are, we can potentially end up like a machine or a toy-robot that is wound up by continuous unwanted thoughts and behaviors. On the other hand – good thoughts and works will take us up.
“If you continuously hear bad words, think bad thoughts, do bad actions, your mind will be full of bad impressions (samskaras); and they will influence your thought and work without your being conscious of it. In fact, these bad impressions are always working, and their resultant must be evil.... The sum total of these impressions in you will create the strong motive power for doing bad actions. You will be like a machine in the hands of your impressions, and they will force you to do evil.
On the other hand, if you think good thoughts and do good works, the sum total of these impressions will be good; and they, in a similar manner, will force you to do good even in spite of yourself.” - Swami Vivekananda
Let’s be good in spite of ourselves. Have a great day y’all. SF
The following is a quote from Vivikenanda (1863-1902). This brief statement about thoughts and actions is very powerful and worth sharing. It relates to this process of self-evolution that is started from the NoFap 90 day challenge. This is very much like nature – we are never static and we are either going up or down. Either we are moving closer to our goal and who we ought to be or we are moving further away from becoming that person. There is a line here that I found particularly powerful “You will be like a machine in the hands of your impressions, and they will force you to be evil.” This is really what we are up against on this journey. Without working hard on who we are, we can potentially end up like a machine or a toy-robot that is wound up by continuous unwanted thoughts and behaviors. On the other hand – good thoughts and works will take us up.
“If you continuously hear bad words, think bad thoughts, do bad actions, your mind will be full of bad impressions (samskaras); and they will influence your thought and work without your being conscious of it. In fact, these bad impressions are always working, and their resultant must be evil.... The sum total of these impressions in you will create the strong motive power for doing bad actions. You will be like a machine in the hands of your impressions, and they will force you to do evil.
On the other hand, if you think good thoughts and do good works, the sum total of these impressions will be good; and they, in a similar manner, will force you to do good even in spite of yourself.” - Swami Vivekananda
Let’s be good in spite of ourselves. Have a great day y’all. SF
