I was first introduced to internet porn in the 90s around the time well, the internet first came out. I had never really received the talk about "the birds and the bees" either, so alot of what I learned about sex was from porn. From the onset of puberty, my life was almost entirely about getting off or getting laid. With the exception of working, I was in constant pursuit of women and as an African American male, that self destructive behavior was in a way EXPECTED of me. I have experimented, so to speak, in various sexual activities and such. Nothing violent or illegal, just.....weird; but I digress. I was engrossed in all manner of gratifications. I have dabbled in various drugs which I won't name, even an adrenaline junkie, and eventually found myself alone, homeless, and ultimately suicidal. Simply put, I had hit rock bottom. With some help, I was able to get out of that proverbial gutter and make some changes for the better albeit with some setbacks, yet one major flaw. Now that I had a roof over my head, internet, and some privacy, I resumed my porn addiction. Even though I'm not in that metaphorical gutter, there are some positive changes I still need to make. I chose to join Nofap not as a dabbler, onlooker, or lurker, but to become a better man as a whole. With some support, I am hoping to turn thought to action....
