New here ..almost a month in and decided to join. Need some support

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by The-O, Feb 9, 2017.

  1. The-O

    The-O New Fapstronaut

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    Hi. My name is The-O
    Im a 28 year old male and this last month has been an interesting experience so far.

    Been an addict to masturbation since I was 12, didn't know what it was really back then, was just something I discovered without knowing what i was doing, something I thought was normal. It was fun and it felt good. When I discovered from my friends what masturbation is it just made me feel even more at ease that it is something every young boy discovers and its natural . That its nothing to be ashamed off.

    In my youth I became aware of late night soft porn showing on Tv and as a young youth with the stamina of Achilles I stayed up to watch and masturbate with reckless abandon at bad porn. Through porn I quickly became aware of girls, lusting over them like a lion would a prey. Thinking constantly of the things I see on Tv and that I want to have that too.

    But the problem came was that I was the school loser. I was bullied, I was beaten, left broken and even the girls mocked me for being me. So my self confidence has been an everlasting issue for me, fearing the weaponize tongue of my peers. Growing fearful to the opinions of what woman think about me, I kept at porn. Kept on masturbating since it made me "feel better". Lost in my sick fantasies my lust has grown and my shame of that lust has made me reclusive, especially towards woman.

    Skipping forward to today I have never had a girlfriend, haven't experienced what it is to make love to a woman. My only experience is what I have seen on websites. My tastes growing every day a bit..darker...a little stranger...a little bit more more evil than before.

    A friend of mine suggested this life style choice of noFap. I have been holding my own for almost a month now. I feel less tired, a little bit less stressed and I feel more confident. It's a triumphant feeling for me that I haven't felt in years.

    But as all good things I have been slipping this last 5 days. Finding my self on those old familiar sites. I haven't MO yet but I could use some support since I cant really talk to people right now who wont understand what it is I'm trying to achieve.

    Thanks you for reading and Good luck with your own adventures

    The-o
     
    i_wanna_get_better1 and D . J . like this.
  2. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Thank you for sharing your story and welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and not judge you.

    Congratulations on the progress you have made.

    What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
     
  3. i_wanna_get_better1

    i_wanna_get_better1 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to the forum. Many of us discovered porn and found it exciting. Never did we realize we would end up like this. It's common for porn to act as a sex education program and a substitute for having a social life. Porn is easier than real life in so many ways, but it never truly makes us happy. Our illness manifests itself in that we KEEP going back to it.

    Another part of our illness shows when we escalate. Our poor dopamine receptors are exhausted from constantly bathing our brains in brain altering chemicals. It needs something new in order to get that same feeling. Therefore our tastes in porn gradually evolve and we end up watching something we NEVER would have found arousing. The good news is that a lot of those tastes start to fade when you remove porn from the picture. Don't get discouraged and define yourself by what kinds of porn you used to watch.

    Continue to build on forming and strengthening relationships with family, friends, and new friends. The opposite of addiction is not abstinence... it's forming real connections with others. The emotional feedback we get from those relationships nourish the soul and makes porn less attractive. It's a life-long skill that needs to be developed, honed, and perfected for long term happiness.

    I hope you find the support and encouragement you need to make your reboot a success.
     
    vibemaker likes this.

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