New to this but plan to break this once and for all!

First time I’ve ever used this type of forum for anything like this. Never been big on them. I’m in my early sixties and I would say I started with porn in my early teens when I first found my Dad’s playboys. Started buying my own not long after that as well as adding Penthouse. Since I had only a few girlfriends in school, my magazines kept me company late at night. Had quite a collection that I kept for many years even after I moved in with my girlfriend that I later married.

I worked in the IT industry for 35 years and was an early user of the internet before web sites. Early on, user groups was a big thing and it didn’t take long for dedicated user groups to start hosting porn images and videos. And that was the beginning of my addiction. When porn web sites started to appear, I followed along there as well, and have been hooked for decades now. A few minutes a day became hours that added up to years of my life on this addiction. At some point, I also discovered strip clubs, massage parlours and escorts and many years were wasted here along with a lot of money.

I’ve been lucky in my personal life in that I’ve had moderate success in my career, and I’m still married with wonderful children. However, I know I could have had much more career success and my marriage would be much better if not for this addiction. There are many regrets that could fill pages. But regrets are in the past, and I’ve always been one to focus on the future. Now that I’m in my early sixties, I’ve found that my sexual function is affected by the extended amount of PMO I have experienced. In reading through the articles on NoFap, I recognized that I have many if not most of the physical and psychological effects that are described. Over the years, I have tried many times to quit this addiction but have rarely gone past a week. Last year while on a family vacation in Europe for 3 weeks, I managed to abstain for 2 weeks, but then I relapsed a couple of times. Once the vacation was over, I fully relapsed.

I won’t go into the story regarding paid sex and extra-marital activities, but I can say that l have been sexually active throughout this addiction. Unfortunately, having normal sex now is quite difficult if not impossible. I experience delayed ejaculation most of the time unless I’ve abstained for a week which is almost impossible. I also recognize that I suffer from the lack of sensitivity which comes from the PMO and contributes to the DE. This led me to stop sex with escorts which may sound like a good thing. But its really because having sex with a condom is utterly impossible for me. When I do have sex, I must finish by masturbating myself and even then, I only orgasm about half the time. This is frustrating, especially since I do not suffer from ED.

I’ve wanted to stop this addiction for a long time and now my inability to have normal sex has become a real motivator. I can’t see myself just masturbating to porn for the rest of my life – I need to have normal sex, including being able to masturbate without porn - and I do believe that fully abstaining from PM will allow me to get back a normal sex life – at least for my age. I remember quitting smoking more than 30 years ago. It was difficult and I only succeeded after a few serious attempts. When I finally did, I found I needed to make a full commitment to quitting and find the right conditions to do it. I feel like I’m at the same situation with porn so I’m ready to start – actually started yesterday.

Going with the ideas in this forum, I’m going to start with a 30 day challenge starting today and will refrain from porn and masturbation during this period. I do have a partner, however, and plan to have sex and orgasms during the 30 day challenge. Mind you, this will only happen once I’ve abstained from PM for at least a week so I can orgasm during sex with her.

Thanks in advance for any encouragement you can offer me. MGL.