Oh no! Temptation back and i'm 115 days in.

So ever since my 90 days I have noticed small Improvement in things but not the most meaningful ones for me..i still lack energy I still have awkwardness with talking to people, which I hate because lately nofap has really helped with attracting attention from ladies I can't seem to dodge them when they stare at me this would be awesome if I knew how to speak, I always knew how to speak to women before I had this problem but now I try to avoid them all until I get well. every day is Hell for me and today was one of the worst urges I've had in a long time it got so bad I started looking up relapse and what is actually a relapse... I found out if I did it once it would be a reset and I noticed my brain getting very happy so I told myself no! and went to bed I see now that my brain is searching for some kind of dopamine. I feel awful I want to make it to four months but right now I feel so bad it feels impossible I pray that I make it past 4 months and eventually snap out of this huge fog that I've been in I want to be free. When is it okay to allow myself one reset? because I feel so awful while I'm in public and while I'm at work I just need some kind of guidance..