"Perhaps I am stronger than I think."

This is a quote from Thomas Merton, a Catholic monk and writer from the 20th century. Merton is one of my favorites writers and I found this line while I was putzing around on Google.

I am very happy to say that it captures my mood right now. Even though I relapsed yesterday (on purpose), I feel good. I feel good because I made it through 28 days of no porn, no masturbation, and no orgasm (without a partner). I'm also not feeling drawn towards relapsing again today. (Hence the quote.) It's no 365+ days, but I'm still proud of what I accomplished and also the fact that I'm not super down on myself for relapsing. Does anyone else feel that there's a danger in being too harsh on yourself when you relapse?

As I said, there's a long way to go, but I look forward to the journey, step by step. I have found that these challenges on NoFap have provided an invaluable experience of self-exploration. When am I led to relapse? How does it feel not to use PMO? What is my relationship to sex and what is society's? What can I devote my mind to when I clear PMO from my life? (That's my current challenge.) No need to answer any of these questions if you're reading this. It's just that there's a lot more to giving up PMO than just giving up PMO. I think you know what I mean.

Anyhow, I'm feeling gratitude. Thank you, members of NoFap. I wish you all the best.