Well, I relapsed. I don't know really to say since its just time to get back in the saddle again. Does it help to leave a post every day for the first 30 days? I am wondering what habits people use to change this as well. I've been on bad streak since the girl I wanted to marry left me back in October. I had my whole planned out with her. Unfortunately, I made her the centerpiece of my life rather than God. When she left, everything came loose. I relapsed into porn again after being clean for years, I blew my $10,000 in savings for our mortgage, I put on 30 pounds, and after bringing my mother roses every Friday for more than 2 years, I stopped leaving her wondering what she has done wrong. I resigned my post organizing a one day, local festival that more than 3000 people attended the past 3 years. I am no longer a volunteer firefighter. How do I pick up the threads of an old life and build a new dream? I need to find my new purpose. Maybe you don't have the answers, silence and meditation I believe are in order for some soul searching. Haha, I just realized that I'm having a stereotypical midlife crisis, which makes me laugh. Thanks for advice in advance, Moose
