Relasped after 77 days!

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by yousuff, Nov 19, 2015.

  1. yousuff

    yousuff Fapstronaut

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    I thought I could not relapsed, but I am wrong. PMO demon still on me. Hell! Feel like I am going to kill myself. My trigger was a stupid TV series, Mortal Combat: Conquest.
     
  2. dzk

    dzk New Fapstronaut

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    I know exactly how you feel. I blew my first reboot after about the same amount of time from a stupid YouTube video.

    Stay strong.
     
    yousuff likes this.
  3. yousuff

    yousuff Fapstronaut

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    Thanks Man. I thought I am stronger but today I am wrong. I could not myself! F***k everything.
     
  4. bm12

    bm12 Fapstronaut

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    Relax yousuf13y. You can still do this. These first few days after your relapse will probably seem the hardest if you keep beating yourself up. That "demon" you spoke of wants you to feel punked out because that's the mindset that keeps you stuck in the porn cycle. You messed up. Let it go an keep going. Now you've got a new goal... get past 77!
     
  5. yousuff

    yousuff Fapstronaut

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    Thanks,Man. Started to feel guilt for this relapse. I had to struggle a lot to reach at 77 days. Now I messed up all.
     
  6. recoome

    recoome Fapstronaut

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    How did it feel during the 50+ or 60+ days? i am 10 days nofap n feel depressed n irritable.
     
  7. bm12

    bm12 Fapstronaut

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    Yousuf13y, you only messed it all up if you stop here. Move on from this.

    Tiredofmyself, I'll be at 10 days this evening and I'm right there with you... tired and itritable. I've made it 6 months straight before. You'll feel way better.
     
  8. JoeinMD

    JoeinMD Fapstronaut

    But, I would think that one has plenty of shields and barricades built up after 77 days - one doesn't just fall so quickly without there having been some warnings and alerts that the shields were weakening.

    Were there hits to your shields at all prior to this event - whether minutes, hours, or days even, thus weakening the barricades in face of this occasion?

    When you were triggered by your television show, was their a true voice (vs. addict voice) within you that still perceived some choice? If so, what made you decide to MO? Was it cause the addict voice told you it would only be a small thing? Or something other?

    Can you detail the experience precisely? It might be useful to do so since you'll have to travel this same, exact path again next time - so it's good to really know what occurred this time in every detail within yourself - your thinking, emotions, body, etc. What happened this time wherein you didn't stop yourself as in all past temptations in the 77 days?

    Learn from this amazing experience - and build again. If you only PMO once every 77 days, consider what great progress that is compared with your previous streaks - now you have the tools (and learned experience still) to do even better!!!
     
    Last edited: Nov 19, 2015
    iLoveHer likes this.
  9. iLoveHer

    iLoveHer Fapstronaut

    Just a quick question, what is KMO ?
    Was it just a typo ?
    To OP: another fapstronaut doing that thing I hate most in this website.
    *PLEASE don't specify what made you relapse, it would only trigger a small urge in other addicts "HOHO MAYBE I SHOULD WATCH IT TOO"*
     
    Last edited: Nov 19, 2015
  10. Stoic

    Stoic Fapstronaut

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    I feel the same like you, i was 2 months and for a stupid tv show i relapsed.Now i feel like shit and it was like lose all that ive gained
     
  11. JoeinMD

    JoeinMD Fapstronaut

    Yes, typo - I fixed it now.

    BTW, By your experiences - I meant internally how you reacted in your thoughts and actions - no need to describe the detailed sexual trigger itself - we know there was one.
     

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