I have previously been married (more than once -- and for over 10 years each time). I have always had a PMO problem, and as well other problems beyond that involving cheating. I have worked very hard on these issues and am finally (and successfully) tackling the PMO issues. I have read lots of the stuff about non-monogamy. I have been in these guys' positions of wanting other women all the time. Both in addition to and to the exclusion of my wife. It's pretty clear to me at this point that when I was married, I selected quickly and poorly (probably related to issues associated with my addiction). In my present relationship of over 2 1/2 years, I'm very comfortable with the idea of monogamy. My g/f is the only person I want to be with, I very rarely fantasize about others. The loving feelings that I have with our sex are beyond anything I have experienced with anyone, and it's by far the best sex of my life (and there is little special physically about it). This is a big change from my marriages, and was not really related to letting go of PMO (I have felt this way since I have been with her). However, in the process of letting go of PMO, it's becoming even clearer to me that she's the partner I want. My suggestion is that we need to first fix our issues associated with our compulsions/addictions/whatever, and then, once this is done, we can see what we have and what we want. Maybe you split up, maybe you don't wish to be monogamous. But when our brains are so fogged, it's very hard to tell which end is up. It's all good IMHO, but the real answers can be totally foreign, elusive, and unexpected while we are consuming our drugs.