Sexting strangers

Congrats for confronting this difficulty.
What do you get out of it?
What do you find exciting?

I often found that I use S. As a mean to replay past frustrations. Like showing myself as a mean to be sure I am fully accepted .

Sometimes professional help can also be useful

Stay strong we do this together

 

Its because this is an addiction! It's not a bad habit. It isn't something we maybe shouldn't be doing. It's almost always a result of something else, often times it results because of some kind of trauma from childhood. CSAT therapy is your best bet of finding out more about the "how & why" of this addiction,and more importantly, how best to fight it.

 

+1 to what Joe said. The acting out is but a symptom of a bigger problem within. Addiction is complex and multifaceted. Getting professional help has definitely helped me to answer some of those "why?" questions.

 

Absolutely! I have found out so much about myself in therapy....... why and roughly when my addiction was formed. I'm learning how to deal with resentments I have, how to make amends to people, and how to move forward in life while fighting my addiction. My therapist has given me so many different things to try that help me deal with my life everyday.

 

This is great to hear Joe! I can relate.

Wishing you the best bro!

 

I always do this when I’m anxious. I have always relied on porn to curb my anxiety but since one year I have decided to not watch porn.
I met this woman recently on an app and started sexting with her. I’m a married man with 2 kids. I always feel really guilty after I’m done with the sexting. I haven’t M in 1 year before I met this girl. She asked me to send her a vid of me touching myself and I did it. I was guilt ridden after that. I deleted the app and everything. I went fine for a week then I got back again and started sexting with her again.
Now I have deleted my account and everything that would take me to that girl. I’m free since 5 days. Let’s see how long this will last. im really worried if I carry this on I am going to meet her and we are going to fuck. I so don’t want that. I love my wife. I don’t want to cheat on her.

 

In the same boat, I am married and have plenty of regular sex, but my issue extends beyond pornography and into realms of sexting and naughty chat - from teenage girls to mature women, even video calls! I can build up a good streak but always find myself going bk to it.

My wife discovered some once, and was angry at first but later told me it turnt her on, and she even joined in with a few. I told her I'd stopped though, but now I'm addicted and feel really guilty. How can I stop?

 

Similar here. And you're right about "not healthy and on my mind a lot."

Interacting with a live person is much more exciting than passively watching precorded porn. I think it's just a case of escalation: our brains have been conditioned (through years of misuse) to be looking for the next "jolt" of dopamine.

You want to stop? Don't start in the first place. Those first few "innocent" (but questionable) moves just start the ball rolling....downhill. But don't trust me for answers: I'm in the struggle too.

 

I only started sexting women once I tried to quit porn - sometimes think it was the worst decision I made, my brain replaced the porn with online interactions with women!

 

Sometimes speaking up and realizing you’re not alone is a huge step. There’s so many men here that have chimed in with issues to more interactive sexual stimulus, so it’s a relief that I’m not broken, it’s a true issue. I too have issues with an app. P is hardly an issue for me at all. But that app has me wrapped around its fingers.

I’m 30+ days sober. Although the app I struggle with is unavailable from the App Store. That’s definitely a factor to my abstinence. But the key for me is to not replace that craving with another sexual stimulus. Instead I read, talk to someone, write, or engage in a hobby.

I too have sought counseling. It’s helped, but don’t fool yourself. At the end of the day, abstinence is something you have to do. No one will take the urges away for you.

Stay strong men, you aren’t alone. Get well for you, you deserve it

 

I've started doing this too, stopped after someone extorted me and threatened to send my photos. My stupid self continued a bit after that incident, but it started to get depressing having women just stop chatting, made me feel more lonely.
At least some of you all are married, not saying this for self pity, but you have more help and support than you may realize (Hopefully I'm not speaking ignorantly).

To come to stopping this aspect of the addiciton, I simply just had to deny myself. Deny my own pleasure, and think about how depressed and lonely I felt after the 10 minute photo exhcnage ended with her leaving me. Think about how ashamed I was for sending nasty photos out online, using each other for cheap pleasure. Shameful. I still slip up, but rarely, and I never send photos anymore.

We can do this, we WILL end this.

 

I'm definitely in the same club but with a few caveats. Porn was my original addiction but it escalated to sexting and video chat. From there I moved to asian massage parlors and then on to escorts. I'm also married with kids.

This addiction is progressive...it only gets worse as we continue chasing that high.

After a 5+ year membership to this community, I've finally strung together 60+ days. Recovery takes action. For an addict like me, it's dedication each and every day. I'm very grateful.

For anybody struggling with sexting/video calls or illicit massage and escorts, feel free to reach out... especially if you're a married man like me.

Wishing everyone the best!

 

That's what we are here for @Smartman-foolsbody! We are all in this together, bro. Always willing and happy to support.

Wishing you the best!

 

Sometimes, even in this forum, we feel alone. Like no one gets our struggle. And in my life there is NOBODY I have been comfortable to open up to. This secrecy is fertile ground for shame, and man I have felt that. I hope you knowing you’re not alone, takes some of that shame away.

All of us ended up where we are “innocently” and unintentionally! None of us wanted to be where we are. I certainly didn’t know where it would lead when I first found that app. But we have to learn and grow and fight and strive to improve. That’s all anyone in life is doing.

Delete that email! Good for you. Know that one day you will have to fight that urge to go back with everything in you, that doesn’t make you a failure. But think of those fighting this fight with you. You can do it. You aren’t alone

 

I am in exactly the same situation. It is as if I am trying to get to a high that I cannot reach with passive PMO. This 'active' PMO is just... Sometimes I don't even really care anymore and I do it on my personal accounts. Sometimes with people I know. And when I am done I feel so incredibly incredibly bad...

 

Exactly this! It's bad when I have started messaging female friends and ex girlfriends too..It's turning us into creeps!!

 

For me it even came to a point where I was calling girls I considered hot anonymously. I just made fapping or grunting noises. I only did this when I was drunk and under influence of other substances. Once I forgot to call anonymously, they (she had a boyfriend) found out and threatened to involve the police. My world broke in pieces... I was praying that people around me would never find out. But slowly I saw more of her friends blocking me... If there was one moment in my life that I truly regretted, this was it. It was such a huge wake-up call that I never walked that path again. I didn't approach girls I knew after that, I never used the substances I was on then, and I never drank that much alcohol again. It's like things have to get really bad before they get better.

It was and is as if I think there is a difference between the online and offline world. I am not a creep in real life, I am a creep on the internet. Which makes me a creep in real life? Currently the bad thing is I am approaching strangers on my personal accounts for this same joy. Which makes it probably just as bad.