Small peins and premature ejaculation

There's been lots of good advice about how to deal with PE on this thread.

But I think I like this advice the best - putting Testosterone levels first. That's something that we do have some control over. I can't speak for the OP, and don't want to hijack the thread, but thank you for this. It's what I needed to hear.

(my T levels are below normal, like 150 dg/L. I have been able to bump it up to about 250 dg/L with good diet, weight lifting, etc. but have been slacking on that front).

 

I’d probably say after banging over 1000 women that I’d be slightly more experienced than obsessing about t levels? But take what advice works for you! How do you even work out your t levels, would you measure these before sex to work out the outcum? Would you say someone about to take a penalty shot would have more chance of scoring if they were confident and relaxed about it. Or someone who had not watched porn and had the t levels of Mr T? Being healthy and strong will make a big difference. But the mind controls the body and Ron Jeremy is hardly athletic! haha sorry it’s getting a bit silly.

 

I don't have the full answer to PE but what I can recommend you, is to stop watching porn and masturbating, since that is not the original design, you would be more propense to PE (premature ejaculation). With PMO you have made yourself addicted to orgasms, you have trained your brain to quickly ejaculate. Also anxiety is a contributor to PE (that is why many people from here has written to learn to breathe and relax).

Maybe there is something you are represing or denying from yourself. Accept what you are, what excites you, what you want, what you wish, maybe you can express that to your wife. But the most important thing is to accept it, or to accept yourself. That would take me to my advice for you, wich is a process, wich begins in having intercourse with your wife doing what excites you, of course your going to ejaculate too soon, so don't try to "not coming to soon", that is the point, to enjoy it, enjoy the feeling of excitation and let yourself to come; what matters here is that you are not denying yourself. Of course, do that in a healthy way. And just do it 1 single time, or maximum 2, but not more than that, because if you do that more times, that is going to keep in you in the same state you are now.

Then what I reccomend you to do, is to talk with your wife (if she is supportive with you, if she is against you, that is going to make things more difficult and maybe It'll be counterproductive to tell her, but since your in a marriage you should face this together), about this, I mean, that you come too quickly and that is not letting you to enjoy sex. Also you should see a sexologist (with your wife), he or she will guide you to learn to control excitation.

The next thing I recommend you is to learn to get used to excitation. And how can you achieve that? well you should know what excites you, but for example you can begin touching your wife, not necesarily sexualy, but in ways that excite you (of course always with consent and in a healthy and human way). Just that, no genital stimulation. By doing that you will get used to excitation, and your excitation threshold will get higher. You must doing in the right way, and the right way is as in any stuff, from the easiest to the most diffcult, step by step, little by little. Maybe begining from touching you can reach tantric sex, and later on, have normal sex.

If you choose to see a sexologist maybe she/he will recommend you to have sex, but since you are here (in nofap) you have practiced PMO, I would better tell you to stop any type of sexual stimulli for a while. That, in order for you to know and realize that you don't need sexual pleausure to live. Porn has distorded our minds so much that we develop sexual dysfuntions. Heal yourself, listen to yourself, reconcile with yourself. You can be happy and a real man no mattering the size of your pennis and the time you last in intercourse. For sure sexuality is part of us, that is why not enjoying sex is causing you troubles and not feeling satisfied or whole or like a "man" (I know what it feels to PE). But what I want to say, is that you are more than what you are describing here, you should know and discover that by and for yourself. Learn to love yourself.

Sometimes or most of the times, our sexual response is affected by our menthal and physical healt and our own state. But in you case I don't think it is a physical issue. And that takes me to the next thing I want to tell you. Most of the sexual dysfunctions are mental issues, that is the case of PE. Until now is not very clear wich mechanism or combination of neurotransmitters releases orgasm and ejaculation. But evidence shows that it is an imbalance in neurotransmitters. Why do others don't come too quickly? Beacuse maybe for them what they are doing, feeling, watching or listening might not be exciting, so the excitation is not given by the thing itself, but for what is means for you, or the value you give it.

It is going to take time, or maybe not too much. But get to know, that you are a real man. Love yourself and love your wife. Everything is possible.

 

2-3inch

 

What do want to achieve from this?

 

Sorry you feel shit mate, it’s a hard time of the year. I do it to myself so I’m no expert on staying off it for long . But it is slightly improving through perseverance. but it’s easy to forget how much lower you feel when you engage in this self trashing behaviour. Do you have any plans for the new year? Maybe search for a good therapist or phycologist! Read their reviews and experience. Dont join SA it’s full of predators who will take advantage of you. Maybe write a list of things you’d like to try, push yourself out of your comFort zone . You’re not a bad person so why do you want to punish yourself?

 

Get blocks applied on your device so you can’t search adult content helps a bit.

 

Yea I’ve known that feeling most of my life! And it’s consuming. I discovered a few years back that I have adhd which means we produce less dopamine, our prefrontal cortex( decision making part of the brain) is damaged meaning impulse control and compulsivity is pretty manic at times. There’s hypersexuality which is linked to mental health. I’m looking into a natural way to try and bring these full on sex binges down. Not sure about more meds. I’ve even wondered if just banging 10 wanks out over 2 days would get rid of it when it flares up. It’s exhausting going around in circles.

 

I figured a nice girlfriend would help but you’re still saying it’s difficult.