Starting to lose hope

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Spidey2Dope, Sep 28, 2015.

  1. Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    I'm over 2 weeks into this and I'm starting to lose hope. I'm constantly having sex dreams but barely ever wake up with morning wood. I find it hard to get an erection around my girl. Also I have this hard flaccid thing that NOBODY seems to be able to tell me if it's normal or not. The hard flaccid thing whats got me down the most. It's like my penis had an inflated tube inside it and it's not spongy or soft like it used to be. I've had this for awhile now. I'm starting to think this whole NoFap thing won't work for me :(. I feel like giving up but I won't. I'm to damn stubborn to quit now. I'm just afaird I will never be able to get good erections anymore with my girl. I want this shit to end now. Is there really any point to this? Am I just doing it for nothing? I feel like crying because I feel like I'm not gonna be able to be the man my girlfriend needs and I love her soooo much. I need this to work but like I said I'm losing faith it will.
     
  2. Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    Well I relapsed and PMO'd even after saying I wouldn't!!!! I feel like such a fucking idiot!!! I hope that all is not lost and I didn't lose some of my progress. I guess I will continue on with my NoFap journey. God I'm such a fucking fool. Well I know I made some progress because I was able to get it up really fast to the P when before I struggled to get aroused. Damnit!!!!!! I fucked up :(
     
  3. grman

    grman Guest

    Don't give up my friend! Star again! Clear your mind!
     
    Indignation likes this.
  4. Indignation

    Indignation Fapstronaut

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    Its Ok man! Relapse is a normal part of recovery. Now you know the program works, and will try harder next time! Don't beat yourself up, and use this experience to make yourself stronger. Beating yourself up will only create another cycle of relapse. Clear your mind like @grman said (Mindfulness Meditation is a good way to help discipline your mind to stay away from unwholesome thoughts.) , and press onwards!
     
    grman likes this.
  5. recoome

    recoome Fapstronaut

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    Dont feel guilty. The cycle of addiction, from what i studied from google is,
    addiction act--->guilty--->self-hatred/disgust--->depression/anger--->self-worth goes down/loneliness--->anxiety creeps in--->more anxiety--->anxiety coping mechanism and we give in--->addiction act--->guilty---

    so maybe to break the cycle you have to attack more than one stages. when anxiety comes, we need to search for better mechanisms, when guilt comes we must accept that we're human.
     
  6. Don't give up my friend! Keep going, embrace the journey and I have faith in you that one day, all your issues will be solved and you'll be able to happily be with your girl! Don't lose hope, NoFap will benefit you if you put in the effort to make it happen! Good luck.
     
  7. I read both of your post! Calm down.. you did not lose your progress if you learned something! So what did you learn? You learned that your Penis is still working and you must not worry about the hard flaccid thing. You said after abstaining for 2 weeks you were able to get erection faster! Great.. now you must wait further more, until you get a faster erection to REALITY! not porn! Just remember one thing! 90 days is the minimum it takes to go back to normal and cure ED! What I believe, is that you must reveal it all to your GF. If its real love between you then she will understand. Don't kill yourself from within. If you reveal it to her then you wont have the compulsion to perform better with her. You can kiss and cuddle till few months.. that's TRUE LOVE also! Be patient... don't worry.... you have started to cure yourself.. you did not lose progress...
     
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  8. Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    Your post made me wanna cry. Plus I have told her about it and she understands. I will just keep going with this. Thanks for the encouragement
     
    pornisnotrealsex likes this.
  9. Keep it up! If not receiving replies on your posts concerns you than its good.. it means you want nofap to work you.. I felt the same and raised my voice... plus to get motivation, you must give motivation! Help newbies. Encourage them. Comment on other peoples post! And never be afraid to ask people to help or read your journal etc. This is why we are here... relationships are always complicated. Glad your GF is supportive. If you get some time, do read my post, the demons hiding inside me.. I will appreciate it!
     
  10. Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    I think I have read it. Arnt you the one that had the social media problem and always making new ones and changing your name? Also arnt you the one that had a break up and you can't seem to get over her? No offense but that's what I remember at least. Do you really think the ED problem will go away? Also is hard flaccid a thing in recovery? I don't see many people talk about that unless it's what people talk about when they say their penis shrinks and shrivels up. Anyways I will go back over to your post and read it again and try to give you any advice I can give. Thank you again
     
  11. Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    Have you noticed any benefits from nofap? Like if you had any sexual dysfunction and it's been getting better? I'm just trying so hard to keep on believing :(
     
  12. Yep! I am that guy... :) don't worry, I never get offended..
    And yes.. ED does go away.. it takes time but it does! Do you know about Gabe deem? Dont wanna freak you out but, It took him 9 months to recover.. you must decide to suffer from anything in order to quit.. I myself had a panic attack on fifth day.. hard flaccid thing is pretty normal man.. its like you overworked your machine and it can't go on! But it gets erected to porn.. so it fine.. give it time! You will see gradual improvement.. it takes around a month for the brain to just recognize what the hell is happening! Then it starts its healing process... :)
    YouTube the following channels
    Sacred sexuality project (best)
    Nofap academy
    And just type nofap in the search bar
     
    Knight Solaire likes this.
  13. Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    So
     
  14. programer

    programer Fapstronaut

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    Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Don't loose hope. Everything will soon be alright. YOU will soon feel great, just keep going on. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
     
    Spidey2Dope and pornisnotrealsex like this.
  15. Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    Not really looking forward to feeling great but more ED and hard flaccid thing to go away. But yeah you're right I need to just get back on track. Thanks for your response
     
  16. Moni

    Moni Fapstronaut

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    Think that you are a crazy scientist. You are in your lab with really long and dirty hair and the camera is behind you. You've got sparks flying off your table and you're laughing like Cruela DeVille. If you are someone who is more inclined towards literature and cinema, think of yourself as Doctor Frankenstein.

    Now to have that heavenly moment you are going to have to go through a lot of not so heavenly moments. You'll think that something is working and when you are almost there, BOOM. Your whole lab goes up in flames.

    To make one moment of divine music you have to slog through countless hours on your instrument. This is life and if you want to have that moment when you are truly free and smelling the fresh air with your partner by your side, smiling at each other, you have to hit the dirt now but know that it will be worth it. I hope I was clear enough because I have a doubt that I wasn't.

    Best wishes and regards
     

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