The 2019 X90 Hard Mode High Accountability Elimination Challenge

Checking in Day 20, Still going strong No PMO. Keep it up everyone, one day at a time.

 

I fucked up. I feel horrible about myself. Want to fucking kill myself. I was weak. I was thinking about my ex and I missed her. She is with somebody else. She is married. Not going to be with her again. FUcking bastard I am.

 

I am restarting my clock from today. Fuck this shit.

 

Setbacks does not mean to just seatback. We make mistakes, and the best thing we can do about them is to learn from them. Dissect what happened. And learn from it.

 

By the way, congratulations on not giving up.

 

Checking in. It was a clean and tiring day full of airports and flights. Just came home now and about to sleep.

Stay clean and strong all.

 

I fucked up too. Was sooo hungover today which just led me down the wrong path. And this happens sometimes to me when I lose momentum and am on a short streak. I barely even tried to stop myself.

But now I'm fully picking myself back up and I'll be using blockers on my phone to get momentum back up. And I'm also going to spend as little time at home as possible - both my last relapses happened at times when I was home alone for pretty much a whole day.

 

Day 19 Check In, No PMO

 

On my computer I'm using FocusMe and on my phone I'm using an app called Flipd. It allows to you lock yourself out of your phone for x number of hours, during which you can only use certain basic apps like phone calls, alarm, calendar, google maps etc. I've used it with great success in the past by "flipping off" (i.e. locking phone with Flipd) before coming home each night. This has worked well for me since I'm usually only home in the mornings and late evenings and I don't need my phone in the evenings anyway. So I'll be getting back into that.

Combined with a strategy to do more of my tasks out of home it's a great plan.

 

Day 10 still going strong thanks to you all.

 

Starting my restart today. As rightly pointed out to me, I needed to keep out triggers out of my purview as it would to relapses. I am going full hard mode and will eliminate Instagram, Youtube, Sanpchat and all social media. My relapse occurred due to a pretty girl in Insta's story and then getting tipsy and cribbing about my ex. This led me to think to fuck this shit'' I am wanking' to Youtube kinky stuff and slob, a thick gush of man-juice.

Just on the lighter note, how does your cum look like after a relapse? Did anybody shoot a thick one over a distance like in Scary Movie 2 (cold storage scene) I have been yanking since 14-15 and I never had a really long distance shot. One more reason to restart the NoFap. To win the pea shooting competition somewhere sometime after my 90/180/360 day challenge

My Day 1 Check in went smoothly. Not much challenge expected today in any case as I released the tension yesterday I will not mess up this round.