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This is my war

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Arbiter, Jan 30, 2021.

  1. Jan 30, 2021 #1
    Arbiter

    Arbiter Fapstronaut

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    For starters I guess its safe to say that Im a nofap veteran, been on and off nofap for about five years now. Ive had really good streaks, the longest of which lasted for 11 months, but I was able to stay strong and have those of quite a regular basis.

    For the last two years or so its been a struggle. While I never completley quit nofap, my habits took a hit. I was never able to achieve what I always wanted - quitting PMO forever. and by forever I mean it - not even a single time of PMO. Full cold turkey mode.

    Ive been able to go 10, 14, 21, 30 days without PMO but just like always, it ended up in me relapsing but even worse, binging, always going for 3-5 times at a session.

    Yesterday was one of those instances - I relapsed 7 times. It sucks. i know the benefits of nofap and trust me I know the damage of PMO but I just couldnt care less.

    I think maybe Im not as strong as I was back then is because I had a clear purpose and vision of what Im doing and what for, and also loneliness is a factor too.
    Not your average loneliness, but rather a romantic kind of one. Its just been a while (4 years to be exact) since I had anything with woman really. And all of my attempts to do so resulted in rejection or just them not being interested, which is fine I guess, nobody owes me anything. But the craving for physical touch and affection is there, cant supress it enough.

    I try to occupy all of my spare time with workouts, music, work, and friends.

    I need some advice on how to beat this damn thing, why am I slipping down so much and so low? Id like to hear useful advice.
     
    Arbiter, Jan 30, 2021
    Arbiter, Jan 30, 2021
    #1
    itneedstoend likes this.
  2. Jan 30, 2021 #2
    Mateus long

    Mateus long Fapstronaut

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    Hi mate, I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with your nofap journey at the moment. Well done for your streaks in the past, 11 months is a crazy achievement, my best is 3 months. Firstly I'd look at what changed between that successful streak and your more recent ones. It sounds like your motivation behind nofap is now less clear, so try and remind yourself of why you are doing it in the first place. I've personally found meditation helpful and it has helped me understand my emotions and what emotions cause me to feel tempted to relapse, as well as helping me understand myself better. I just do 10 minutes in the morning and 10 in the evening. With the loneliness that sounds tough for sure and am in a long distance relationship so struggle with this also. I'm not sure how this suggestion is relevant but maybe try hugging friends or family members as the physical contact definitely helps reduce loneliness for me personally. Ah bro I can relate so much to relapsing multiple times at once and it is my usual pattern also. I managed to just do it once for the first time when I last relapsed and the key for me was just not attaching guilt to relapsing and telling myself that it is okay. I hope this helps a bit bro, all the best, you can smash this. Feel free to reach out to me if you need!
     
    Mateus long, Jan 30, 2021
    Mateus long, Jan 30, 2021
    #2

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