Work related trigger

Recently at my job I had changed my schedule to make it easier for me to spend more time with family and to go to SAA meetings. My schedule had been a approved recently but I noticed that in the next two weeks my hours had reduced drastically. Pretty much from an average 40 hour work week to 4 days and even a 1 day of work for the lastest up coming week.

Immediately I was furious, sad and even fely betrayed in a sense. Getting so few hours made me go into a panic mode, I immediately thought of the times I've been fired, of all the jobs I that I have had in the past and just a general feeling of feeling like a complete looser. This also triggered in effect in my brain wanting to me to masterbait to porn so I can rid myself of the stress.

I almost gave in but thankfully my phone is decently filtered and the porn blockers serve as a warning sign that I'm loosing control.

I immediately started listening to a "the porn reboot podcast" on Spotify as a means to distract me and it did.

I was also able to slow my breathing down like I have practiced with medidation.

Finally once I had a clear mind, I called my boss and explained to him the situation in a negotiating type of vibe. He said he will look into and and give me an update when he gets back from a business meeting. This greatly relieved me and I able to enjoy a moderately decent day.

It could have turned very ugly real quick. Even though my schedule is still in question. I didn't need to be upset or panic as much as I would have.

Just wanted to share some progress.