Im always glad to see you post. You have been on this challenge for so long and proven that you have so much potential. I really hope Ill see you persevere until the end.
My daughter is across the street at her friends house so im taking this oppurtunity to check in. Yesterday and so far today there was no addictive behavior- not even so called harmless ones. I'm more aware of discomfort rising from inside and have been able to be with it. Except for the 40 minutes of frustration and anger a couple of nights ago everything else has been relatively minor. Also I started seeing a therapist lately , she helped me with another addiction and is now in charge of California's addiction program. We developed a good rapport and I've spoken and helped at the facility in southern cal here . Anyway I started seeing her again basically to get to the root causes of my self destructive behavior. Anytime things start going well I sabotage it some way. Anyway she suggested a 7 day anger diet - since anger is a big issue with me- which means I sit with the anger but don't express it in anyway that's destructive or inapropriate. I started at 10:45 yesterday and so far so good. Since I've made t he decision to avoid all addictive behavior and to face and go thru what I've always avoided in the past this journey has become alot more exciting to me. One more day- one day at a time.