The Jedi Temple (open)

So I got to 5 days with out masturbation then I had dispersonastion or however you spell it. Basically I lost my grasp on reality to some extent. Like everything looked artificial and that scared the shit out of me. So I fell off the wagon then I had severe ptsd symptoms. I'm not sure if the ptsd symptoms were related to NoFap cause I was having symptoms before hand. That was actually the reason why I started this. I kind of think going back to porn is what got the ptsd going so I'm gonna try it again. My streak just started at 4 am and I've learned how to meditate better and got a very good app for it. I've also found other good coping mechanisms and am listening to every book I can find on porn addiction. I'm proud of making it five days that was like a experiment if my mind goes all wacky this time I'm just gonna try to stick with it. Any way 0 days starting now.

 

day 54
tired after a good day of work... can't wait to dye my hair this weekend !

may the Force be with you.

 

Day 6 . Remind me of more reasons to continue this journey pals. My longest streak is of 60 days and I havent been there in a while.

 

day 55

the reasons must be yours.

• to increase your own will power
• to have control over your dirty thoughts
• to have more time
• to be more present for your relatives
• ...and so on

 

One day. I found some coping mechanisms and I'm keeping myself busy.

 

What time zone is this forum on? I just changed it to mine I hope it updates right from now on.

 

Day 3. It's hard to believe in the beginning of this journey but the more you try the less of a hold PMO has a hold on you.

 

Day 21, checking in.

 

day 56
i have to rewrite my CV in another langage it is something i dread but i have to.

 

So I have 2 days. I shifted my goals I see people on here with long streaks of PMO and I don't think that's for me. But I'm completely sick of porn and if I never look at it for the rest of my life that will be fine. So I'm gonna swear off porn but still masturbate. It takes a couple days to work up enough tension to be able to do that anyway cause of my addiction but I hope that will get easier. Sorry if I'm writting to much in here.

 

Day 0 relapse. I think a very essential thing I'm missing is having a meaningful job. I work at a gas station and hate it. I want to get a trade and covid through all that up in the air. I was having a lot of anxiety about that but I'm going to apply to my local trades colleges now. I think that if I can get that important piece of the puzzle in place for myself then it will be easier to end my PMO addiction. Meaningful and gratifying work I think will allow me to channel my mental energies in a better direction.

 

Day 0.

 

Day 22, checking in.

 

day 57
overslept. i must wake up.

 

Day 3

 

Day 23, checking in.

 

day 58,

i could easily have given in this morning... byproduct of a morning erection. i feel so "horny" all the time. hard to think about anything else but curves and sex.

 

Day four

 

Day 24, checking in.

 

day 59, hard to think about anything but sex when i am by myself but, i am able to do something that i find engaging and then the thoughts melt away.