Post published by throwmealine
I feel a great sense of shame in that tonight I relapsed. It started me with me, out of nowhere, feeling incredibly female. I took on a girly demeanor, the voice, the walk etc. I watched some sissy hypno and in the chat room associated with the videos, a user told me that sissy hypno had ruined their life and they wished they had never started because although they are straight, they are hooking up with men for sex which they hate. They felt they had been taken over. I feel that way too.
I left immediately and headed over to a blog site and instead looked at images of feminine women. As I did so, I felt even more girly and imagined I was them and that alone made me climax. My prostate is very swollen through edging and overuse basically and the orgasm associated with it, just hurt. It burned as I came. I am doing terrible damage to my body. I feel possessed. I am not the guy I used to be, who checked out a hot chick and wanted to nail her. Now I feel feminine when I see a woman and feel I am her. I worry sissy hypno has destroyed my brain for life.
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StarLightReboot
Nothing can destroy your brain, it's just the amount of work you have to put up is different. Yes, sissy stuff is hard to deal with - but doable. And you can fight that, too. Believe in yourself, and know that there's a way for you to get yourself out of life you don't want
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Becoming Jasmine
Trust me, it can be done. You just have to get over that hump of difficulty, and then it starts to get better. I was addicted to porn since around 12 years old, and now I don’t need it at all. I still get urges, but I can easily ignore them. Hell, the only reason I’m still here is because I’m not sure the effects have totally worn off yet, but the porn itself is gone.
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Becoming Jasmine
My point is, it can be done. It just takes time and energy. Stay strong.
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Maninsearchofasoul
@Becoming Jasmine and @StarLightReboot are right. It's just going to take longer than regular porn. The one thing I can say is focus on improving your life as a whole instead of just abstaining from porn. Have you ever tried a program called Future Authoring? I started doing it recently and it is really super when it comes to making a plan to improve your life as a whole
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throwmealine
Thanks everyone. I didn't watch P today however the need to wear a dress and walk about like a girl was very strong. I do feel possessed.
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modernstore99
It might be good to see an actual doctor about this. Although everyone on this site knows that watching porn OR engaging in your fetish in any way is detrimental to your sexual health, most of us just have anecdotal evidence and are not medical experts. IN addition to not PMOing in anyway, it might be good to be medicated or see a doctor.
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