DAY 19 Mistakes have been made. I was in the washroom having number 2 with phone in my hand. Unforturnately I was on instagram and saw some posting about "underboob", big mistake... I got reallllllly curious and went on search.... eventually arrived to the famous well known porn site... I searched the word but caught myself suddenly and searched nofap instead, then saw a thumbnail of instant noodles and watched a 30second video of a picture of instant noodles...on a porn site. Then its settled. I quit the link and finished what I was supposed be doing... I don't know... I did visited a porn site but no porn vid except instant noodles vid have been watched... Does that count as a relapse? The thought of jerking did come to me but I ignored it... Feels bad..... why am I so curious on the new word underboob! Should I reset the cycle?? PEACE OUT
I wouldn't say this is relapse but you were dangerously close. Leave that freaking phone, give it to someone, lock it away I don't know but don't touch it ! Phone addiction is almost as bad as the P thing.
DAY 20 It's early morning. Woke up at 4:30 from a 5hrs sleep. Got physics test and another midterm tomorrow. Anyway that's something else...nonsense morning talking To #22floor Dutchd. Yesss the phone addiction is another aspect I gotta work on.. IOS12 has the screen monitoring timer which counts the viewing rate and I can set daily app usage time which can help with the addiction...I'll keep the cycle days but if that ever happen again I'll defintiely reset it! Updates will be posted more frequently with more details once this week is finished... Miss those good days of sleeping... KEEP WORKING HARD MY DUDES
DAY 29 So I'm on, again. I was away for five days while visiting my friends at another city. It was a good break from all the stressful school stuff... Now back to the main course, time to prepare myself for the test on Monday. Btw, the scores for the two major tests were posted. I got 60 for one and 55 for the other. I know its my fault for the score... Its a huge drop in effort and just everything from back in highschool, and now I questioned how the heck did I ended with a 94% average in highschool... maybe I do need to kick my ass and try to become what I use to be... *Don't wanna type too much cuz that'll scare ppl away from reading;D JUST WANT TO SAY I'M BACK TO YOU LOVELY FELLOWS!
DAY 42 It has been abvious that recently I wasn't so active in posting "daily updates" as I said so from the intro... The reason being was somewhat weird, its the thought of unimportance to the site and to this whole idea of no PMO. I know thats not me. So here I am again, currently time is 3:15AM. To express my future urge on PMO, I've copied and slightly edited a ranking difficulty scale from a post called "I didn't materbate for 30 days. Here's what happened". No PMO Difficulty Scale: 0- Por..what? Mast..what? Orga..what?? Busy AF so nothing matters to me except STUDYING 1- Oh, PornMasterbationOrgasm. Interesting but I'm busy 2- My mind travelled to the fantasy region and then back 3- My mind is in a constant loop between the normal and fantasy region filled with nudity and fun actions 4- Man, it must be nice to watch something sexual 5- I think I should deserve to watch porn and maybe not MO 6- I hope SOON I will WATCH PORn and MasterBate and oRgaSm 7- AHHHHH Why on God’s green Earth am i doing this to myself?! 8- Please! I need to explode ASAP, PPPPPOOOORRRRNNNN FFFFAAAAPPP 9- My penis is sending death threats to my brain, I'm dying from not fapping 10- I want to put my semen in everything >:C So yea, I will try to keep this post updated daily, it may be extremely short but I'll try my best. DON'T DISAPPOINT YOURSELF MY FELLOWS
DAY 43 Thanks to #26 floor Balbur, I was in such a panic and searched nofap which got me to the noodle vid lol No PMO Difficulty: 2 I was online shopping today and the advertised clothing model made me think off track for a moment before I stopped myself and this happened several times. What's hard for quiting PMO was from all those stored PMO memories. It can be hidden but never be forgotten, and sooo many random things can trigger those past memories. Its 2:27AM, gotta go bed. KEEP WORKING HARD MY DUDES
Day 44 No PMO Difficulty: 2 Don’t remember how but I did think sexual things at some point during the day, warned and stopped myself. STAY ALERT WITH YOUR THOUGHT SO YOU CAN STOP IT BEFORE YOU REGRET IT!
Day 45 No PMO Difficulty:1 Lucky day, I woke up around 12PM and spent most of the time on bus rides (my bike got stolen at uni) so to buy a used one from someone else that’s about an hour bus ride away. Anyway nothing triggers me and my thirst level was low for the entire day. NIGHT MY DUDES
Day 46 No PMO Difficulty: 5 ♂️ Almost fucked up. Maybe I’ll talk tomorrow depending on mood. I’m still okay. STAY STRONG MY BROTHERS
Day 47 No PMO Difficulty:5.5 Awfully painful mind work to fight off the urges. Lots and lots of wrong thinking. I tried meditation yesterday and cannot keeping my head clear of nothing. I hit the panic button multiple times both yesterday and today. Stress level is insanely high. The second wave of midterm tests are approaching, tougher, more sufferies than last time. STAY STRONG STAY STRONG STAY STRONG MY BROTHERS
Day 48 No PMO Difficulty: 2 Besides some weird mood flaws there’s really not much thirst in entertaining myself today. The mood flaws- At some point after school I felt upset and mad for some reason. I also had plenty negative thoughts on the viability of the relationship I’m having... Anyways, I was aware of the issue and avoided having too much interference with others. (I believe the mood is caused by having too little sleep last night) GOOD DAY GOOD NIGHT
DAY 1 *Sign.. About yesterday, idk what to say... a BIT CRAZY like the devil finally found the fragile point and break free of the barriers..I couldn't fell sleep for like an hour afterwards. When I closed my eyes, all those pictures and nudity thoughts and just BOOM everything jammed in my head. What a fail. I don't even know what I'm talking about... NO PMO DIFFICULTY: 3 I'll try my hardest to retrieve what I had achieved before, and even evEN EVEN BETTER I'll accept the downfall, accept my emotions, accept the tragedy, and continue on my mission. THE ROUTE TO FREEDOM IS NEVER EASY
DAY 2 NO PMO DIFFICULTY: 2 Decided not to sleep at all. Preparing for tomorrow’s midterm. I’m all booked with midterm and lessons this weekend! How exciting! WORK HARD AND AVOID PLAYING