Hi, im Problem88 and I need advice for my boyfriend who is copping with porn addiction. He used to do reboot and to succeed when doing so but lately there has been some issues... he relapses and it affected our intimicy baddly this time and I just dont know how I can help him... So if anyone as advices, let me know.
Sorry if I am intruding on this women page since I am a man. My best advice is to support him all the way and if you stay or live with him try to occupy him with stuff to distract him from boredom because boredom is one of the challenges that most likely make him relapse. Be patient and I promise you, you won't regret.
The idea of rebooting is good. However, if his idea was to white knuckle through 90 days and then he'd be cured, that's not how it works. He needs to own this as a life change - one that can take months or years of internal searching and work and consistent vigilance and growth. You can help him by being honest how it makes you feel, by being honest about the consequences, but only HE can really change his actions.
The best thing ive done is allow my girlfriend to install blocking and monitoring software on all my devices. Its 1 tool in the kit thats helping me and slowly rebuilding mutual trust in the relationship. Not only is it good for her to feel like shes actively doing something to help. I also feel like my girl has my back even if its tough love.
Is his job to fix hymself. Your only job is support him if you want to. Also is your job to choose the best male for you. If he is not willing to put the effort to heal hymself you should look elsewere for a guy that have his shit together. Lots of woman get stucked with demaged guys thinking they can fix him and loose a lot of years with them. Be sopportive with him but also look at his action, if he is working hard to get better you can consider been there by his side, but if he is not then you really need to think about letting him go until he figure that shit out or forever.