THE INTERSTELLAR CHALLENGE !

Actually I have no will to start PMO again neither my body is forcing me to relapse. I am feeling kind of brain fogging

 

It will only be a matter of time, find something new to do, get out and move.

 

Day 1 today,
ultimately it comes down to learning how to deal with negative emotions, without the destructive escape machanisms.
I used to think that most of the time I would watch porn because of boredom. While that could be the case in the past, just pure boredom is not able to make me do that anymore. During the last relapse I was feeling upset. Other feelings might me disappointment, loneliness etc.

 

Excellent my friend I noticed last week when I almost gave in I looked at myself in the mirror with a hand on my pants ready to drop em lol and just thought this is so pathetic look at yourself. And I don't believe I will ever pmo again. Just know the longer you go the more strength you get to resist and it gets more and more undesirable.

 

Still Day 0

 

Day 23

 

Get a good sleep.
Study your favourite subject!

 

I had a similar experience with fighting the urges that kept getting stronger for 24 hours before I relapsed. It definitely sucked, but I avoided the chaser effect and hopefully you can too. I have successfully made it a day and a half clean, so I am thrilled for that. Hopefully you do not lose hope and let the guilt of betraying your siblings trust get to you. And unless you feel like you need to tell them, I would just make sure the history is cleared and let bygones be bygones. I had promised my mom at one point not to look at porn on her computer, but I did a couple times, and maybe when I have been clean a couple years, I will tell her, but probably not. I felt super guilty to the point where I looked at porn on one of my devices to justify to myself that I did not need her computer to do it. Needless to say, I did feel better, but I did go on a binge, so I recommend just moving on and letting the guilt pass. We are addicts, and addicts tend to break trust at times, but we just have to keep going. There is a reason that the 12-step program has a part where you apologize and mend broken relationships. It is because we all do it as addicts whether we realize it or not.

Hope you helps. Also, day 1.

Best,
Mathman1994

 

Yea bro, the chaser effect is what had me so frustrated it didn't make any sense.
You know my beliefs I believe God is the one who gives the power to overcome. Even if you don't believe in God at AA and NA meetings they talk about there being God or a higher power at work and they realize they are powerless against whatever demon they are battling with. In our case it's lust but often there is other factors that are causing us to go to pmo for a form of safety or relief from stress and anxiety. But perhaps there would be some wisdom in acknowledging God in this matter and simply saying God I am powerless in this struggle where are you can you please help. Something like that way I see it what do you have to lose even if you don't believe what's the worst that could happen you get free and clean?!

 

Day 24

 

I also find it hard to let my phone completely out of my room. When being alone with my thoughts and they get negative, I tend to grab my phone at night to distract me.

 

Sorry bois . Relapse.
This time I'm taking Nolan with me.
I will win

 

Yes indeed.

Just somehow, work harder, do whatever to get out of the first days bro.
Then it’s practically more doable.
Just do anything to get out of the initial days.

It’s good you have this realisation. Now put it to use

You got this bro.




Check in!

 

Day 2