Addicted to PMO because of the Emotional Abuse from a Narcissistic Psychopath

If there is no enemy within , the enemy outside can do you no harm It does not matter what anyone says about you, the only thing that matters is what you say about yourself. Also, no amount of money is worth it to destroy your life. Life doesn't need to be this hard. Ask and accept help from others, don't be ashamed and move out of that horrible situation.

 

Excuses sounds best to those who make them up you know. You can put me down, insult, humiliate, threaten, coerce and torment every day, even every single second. It will not affect me any longer. In fact my stepdad even did that while I was younger. I was lucky enough to learn from David Goggins about mental toughness. You can do whatever you want with me now and I'll be okay.

That being said I am not you and vice versa. But if you truly want out, you just go. I don't know what you are afraid of, change, the unknown, failure, disappointment or whatever. You have to decide for yourself. Life is all about making choices. You can either stay and things won't change. Or you move on and take care of yourself. You will figure it out along the way. There are enough resources and people that want to help you. But it's up to you ofcourse.

 

There are shelters for this sort of thing. You should look into it.

As difficult as this is, I don't see it getting any better if you stay.

 

Honestly, I can't imagine what you are going through and if this person is as you describe him he won't let you go and we don't know much about your relationship so
The only solution I can think about right now is to be stronger emotionally maybe try finding a support group even online where you can work on your insecurities and you can be more open about what you are dealing with.
And since you are in this forum nofap will help you it will be hard at the beginning but POM is something that blinds us and numb us so getting rid of it will make more space for you to improve your mental health and then gradually you can work your way to a be financially independent
I hope you will find a way out soon

 

Take ownership of your own life, that's all I have left to say now because you don't really want to be helped it seems to me. Pointing fingers to that psycho won't help you, neither is staying there. It's sad you don't see the solution and are so afraid to leave. Anyway I hope you find a way out soon.

 

It's a difficult situation and one I understand to the fullest - I stayed with my ex-wife for a long time, trying to make it work, even when she was lashing out on me.

What I can recommend is that you talk about this to someone. Speaking to my therapist has made realize stuff on my own - when you're vocal about it all, you can begin to muster the courage to leave / change your life around.

That's a bit prickish thing to say - you don't know the person's story and it's never that easy to just pack up and go.

 

It is always easy. The only thing that is holding you back is your own mind. You pack your things and leave the door and close it behind you. Even if you have to start from 0 and are a few days homeless. I did it on multiple occasions. Even on my 18 birthday I took everything and went out. That shit is scary, of course. But it's better to go through hell and come out the other side than just staying in hell. In 5 years from now, she will still be there being more bitter, more afraid of that guy, nothing will have changed, except the fact she got older and will waste another part of her life.

 

She wont change. You can stay and change, or leave.

 

(This isn't legal or medical advice.)

With that said, I highly recommend that you document every instance of abuse that this person puts you through.
Do they yell at you? Start recording.
Do they physically hurt you? If it's safe record and/or document the injuries, bruises, and scars when it's safe too.
Keep a video journal of each day or week if safe.
Do they steal money from you? Record the evidence.

Can you live with your parents or other family members? If so start formulating plans on how you would do it.

Amass as much evidence as you humanly can and then hand it to the police or a social worker if you're not comfortable going to the police yourself. ONLY after you can find somewhere to live safely.

Again this isn't legal or medical advice.

 

I'd recommend you to watch the youtube channel begood4000, he talks alot about narcissism and how they operate, it will give you much needed perspective.

Aside from that I think you should create boundaries, a lack of boundaries got you into this mess so do right by yourself and stop being a doormat.

I'm not saying lash out either, you have to address your weaknesses for your own sake, not because him or anyone will take advantage of them.

Good luck.