2 years, 2 months and 2 days in hard mode. A true miracle

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Proxydore, Jan 3, 2018.

  1. innermostheart

    innermostheart Fapstronaut

  2. You are my idol man. So much impressed by what I read!
    I have taken an oath to be celibate and it's great to see that people like you have already done this. Are you a celibate btw?
    So much inspiring content. Thanks for sharing brother!
     
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  3. jobbyj

    jobbyj Fapstronaut

    well done sir
     
  4. Proxydore

    Proxydore Fapstronaut

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    Hello my friends,

    Thank you very much for all the great and encouraging comments ! Today I can say : YES one can be free from PMO, permanently and for good. YES, one can be liberated from a wrong, deadly idea of sexuality and love, of a wrong idea of femininity and masculinity. I am also convinced that it can't be achieved alone.

    Sure ! The benefits I'am experiencing : I am more happy, less false, less two-faced, less hypocritical. With women, I am simply myself, I lost this terrible anxiety I had everytime I would talk with a girl, because I lost any wrong fantasy and wrong intention against women. When I am with a girl, today, I am simply with her, I can be joyful and direct, and I don't have this film in my head anymore. The voice that tells me "You must seduce this girl, she MUST love you, you have to sleep with her" etc... has totally disapeared ! I don't objectify women anymore, I understood that women are human beings, with a soul, a spirit, beautiful beings worthy of love, interest and respect. I feel much better in every area of my life, I sleep better, I feel more sicure about my capacity, my will, my life in general... I KNOW that it is possible to change for the best every area of my life. I often remember the speech I would tell to myself three years ago : "it is impossible to change, to stop P or O, I have done it for too much time, now it is in my DNA..." Today I can affirm that I was wrong : i experienced that it is possible to change radically. I often tell to myself, when I have a difficulty : "I stopped PMO, so their is nothing I can't change !" and it gives me a lot of confidence and courage. Also, at the spiritual level, my faith is more rooted than ever : I experienced its power and its validity in my flesh, and for me, is the strongest motor I could fine. I feel in harmony with God, with nature, with society, with myself. When I would do PMO, I would consider myself an animal, a monster or a psychopath. I would consider that a "true man" is one who sleeps with every woman he inconters, and so I would be over frustrated. Today, all this neurosis has disapered. Yes, I think this is the greatest benefit I earned : maturity, reconciliation with reality.

    I won't say that I am a superhuman, thant I healed every aspect of my life, no ! On the contrary, it helped me a lot to accept myself as I am : weak, not better than my neighbor, full of incapacity and failures... But loved and accepted just as I am !

    I was sad, angry, frustrated and cynical. I had a girlfriend but I would still PMO everyday. I was lost morally : I had lost the notion of good and bad... I believed it was necessary, in order to be a "real man", to dominate, to speak louder than the other etc... I would wear a mask, a false image of myself. Pratically I was depressed ! Two things changed my life : i encountered Jesus in my life, and, thanks to him, I stopped many bad habits : videogames, PMO, virtual addiction, angryness, sport obsession, etc...

    Yes, yes, I fully agree with you : we often relapse because of things that we don't even consider bad things. Example : films, series, ADs, videogames, girls on the street, wrong conversations, books, etc... According to me, the more we throw away any trigger, the more we are happy, and free in our head and hearth. But this has been a key for me : NEVER watch a girl in the street. Or at least, NEVER watch twice. Lower your gaze my friend, lower your gaze. The first time you see her, it's not your fault, you can't be blind. But the second time, it's all about free will.

    My friend, it needs time, but I am sure that after 4 or 5 months you'll really begin to experience all the benefits : happiness, smiling, being more simple and natural socially. Do you think your social difficulties could have an other origin ? Maybe other bad habits you have ? Did you throw away every trigger in your life ? Every source of social anxiety (bad social networks, depressing internet sites/films, etc?...) Because triggers create social anxiety : it makes you feel ashamed and frustrated. Do you have a spiritual life, do you pray ?

    Here I talk from my own, personnal point of view : it helps A LOT to pray, to speak with God about our difficulties. I believe he ALWAYS listens to us, because He is everywhere, and always comes to help a man who is sincere and open his heart to him.

    Man, keep it up, you did an AMAZING strike, 80 days !! If you continue like this, in one year you'll be an new man, I am sure of this ! I will pray for you my friend !

    I don't remember exactly, but I would say that after one year I wouldn't have wet dreams or intrusive thoughts anymore.

    Unfortunatly no, it would be very pretentious (and dangerous) thinking that ! I think I am more weak than ever :) I have no control of myself, that's why I am very carefull about triggers : I avoid everything that could trouble my inner peace and my chastity. But I must say that today it is very easy for me to not P or M or O : I feel much better without doing it. I don't have ANY temptation about doing it : I don't struggle anymore. But I'am sure that if I leave my "safe space", if I expose myself to triggers, the temptation will strike hard again.

    Yes ! I am doing the "postulate" in order to become a franciscan friar. If it's God will, in one year, and a half, I'll make the vow of chastity : I would like to chose celibate for life ! And I promise you that the friars and nuns I know are very, very happy : sex or conjugal relations aren't necessary in order to be sane and joyful. I think the only thing we need is love : love in fraternity, love with God, love with every human being... If there's love, there is sanity and life !

    My friends, I want to tell you : COURAGE ! It's worth it, it really, really do. At the begining, the fight is very difficult. But with time, it becomes natural : the temptation disapear, only the peace remain.

    I think that if you pray the rosary every day, with the precise request of being liberated from PMO, you'll be liberated for sure and you'll receive the divine strenght for your quest !

    Pax et Bonum !

    Proxy
     
    Last edited: Apr 10, 2018
  5. Ed1234

    Ed1234 Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations on 2years! Very inspiring! Keep it up brother!
     
  6. robot369

    robot369 New Fapstronaut

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    Great!I hope i can achieve it someday
     
  7. metalshivam01

    metalshivam01 Fapstronaut

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    It inspires me alot.Alot!
     
  8. Proxy
    Thanks brother. As you clearly mentioned, it's about the courage. It's about the decision to make. I can clearly feel so much power in your words; that's the power of chastity. You removed all my brainwashing & I guess I now have better purpose than eating, sleeping & indulging in bodily pleasures.

    Though I indulged uncontrollably in sex for 2 years, I could never find any meaning out of those acts. The momentary pleasure, guilt & shame that never goes, weak health, spots on face, academic breakdown & never being able to stop & feel satisfied - I thought that there is something wrong with me. But my mental, physical & spiritual health has been restored just in 50 days & I have realized now what freedom means.

    And about sex & girls - " Once you start, you can never stop." Moderation is the key but it's a perpetual cycle that never stops. And hence saying NO may be a better solution.

    I am hindu & have found some faith in bhagwan (that's what we call God) though I was atheist back then. Thanks for your amazing post man. You would be someone big brother! Take care & come up with more content.
     
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  9. thelasttruthtold

    thelasttruthtold Fapstronaut

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    Another inspirational story. I admire your strength to overcome this horrid addiction
     
  10. In 15 years you will can start to be known for bilocation, stigmata, healing with a touch, etc. if you go down this route :) best of luck. You took an long path of priesthood/monkhood but will have made your life worth it greatly in the end.

    I find strength in your words tonight.
     
  11. BrainChanger

    BrainChanger New Fapstronaut

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    Excellent!
     
  12. be smart and intelligent

    be smart and intelligent Fapstronaut

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    EXACTLY this is what i have been doing for the last three years and with huge intensity. infact i have develop it as a habit...i can do it for next one thousand years e a s i l y and yes ...it makes life a lot lot lot lot easier
     
  13. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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    We are all in this together
     
  14. ele7ven

    ele7ven Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for sharing this. Im on the very beginning of this path.
     
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  15. rebootnog

    rebootnog Fapstronaut

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    Finally i understood that the unique way is to pray the rosary.
     
    ele7ven likes this.

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