I reached the 44th day. I can't say I see pink life. I have a habit of healthier living. my taste changes in matters of woman I am more cheeky on the vibe than appearance. I socialize more because I am more often outside. I do not maintain any friendship except those of very long standing just nice but superficial meeting. I play sports every day, boxing, crossfit. on the other hand I have dark ideas, and of suicide and a desire to live for those whom I love. I think I can drown it is dark in me discipline, adventurous but if it gets worse I plan to go fight my bloody face in a ring. I believe that I have a mental problem against myself and I do not speak. on the longterm I feel the need to write my career and resume studies in order to offer support to the gent suffering from mental illness.