92 day update - somewhat success

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by Pete the friendly Dragon, Sep 28, 2018.

  1. *******two questions on the bottom*******

    On this day in June, I made a single post pleading for hope for relief from my porn addiction because I felt it was negatively impacting my life, emotionally and physically, as I have a porn induced ED.

    I haven't been posting on here or using the counter because I didn't find that I needed to. But I do want to update my story so people can hear me, and so I can discuss a few concerns I have.

    In 92 days, I've been trying "hard mode." I wouldn't say this time has been immaculate, and I probably would've reset a few times and haven't really fulfilled the terms of the book-defined goal. However, my goal was to abstain from orgasm to avoid the chaser effect, which I have succeeded upon, and most importantly, to stop looking up live action porn from websites such as PornHub, Xvideos, etc. That too, has been successful. My goal overall, especially after reaching certain rungs of success, was to minimize as much artificial sexual stimulation as possible as to reboot, and begin to reverse the issues causing my ED. As for that, I have noticed slight changes this far. The think test, in which you think sexual thoughts with no visual, audio or physical aid to try and obtain an erection, has become possible for me. If I try really hard to think, I become somewhat hard in the right circumstances. It's possible I could do this before my reboot, but I see it as some hope because I've noticed a couple times where I was obtaining 70% erections at random points, such as during class. Morning boners are still very strong and come every morning, which is something that was never lost, but continues to bring hope of a recovery in normal contexts, without porn.

    Because there is no need for me to turn back now, and I still believe I'm having erectile problems, I'm continuing my reboot the same way as long as I need. And remember me saying my time wasn't immaculate? Yes, there were a few times, all in the final 30 of 90 days, where I did masturbate, but not to orgasm. A tool I used which eventually led to this resetting was the subreddit titled "gonewildstories" in which people detail their supposed real life, noteworthy sexual encounters and stories. I felt it was a non pornographic (at least visually or audio wise) say to stimulate myself, and my mind, which I figure might need it. It also sometimes gave me an erection, which I have mixed feelings on. However, a couple times these stories included nude pictures, which I did briefly look at. I have also looked up nude pictures of my ex (with her consent) once or twice spanning a couple minute spans without masturbating. There were also plenty of times I saw nudity on the internet unintentionally. Although I do not see the accidental encounters as an issue, and in all three cases I only viewed briefly without and masturbation, I would like to try harder to avoid these scenarios going forward.

    I also went on my first date during this reboot period two days ago. Nothing sexual or physical happened, but it was interesting to get back out there. I definitely feel my confidence has gone back up recently.

    Finally, two questions I have. I may make separate forums for these, but for now, I'll just put them here.

    What are your thoughts of the reading of sexual/erotica stories from Reddit? Is it healthy for a reboot? How I see it is, it's not porn, and it works to stimulate the mind, which perhaps is healthy for a reboot, but it's also not gaining stimulation from normal or real life sex means or encounters. It doesn't necessarily stray from detailing abnormal sexual behaviors either, which we look to avoid in porn, especially.

    And what tips might you have for continuing my reboot as a person whose goal is to backtrack and reverse the symptoms of porn induced ED? I haven't exactly made out with a woman to test my ability to gain erections from real encounters, but from my own thoughts and feelings, I think I still have quite a ways to go there, even after 90 says or trying my hardest.

    Thank you for reading! Have a good day, and good luck on your personal journeys!
     
  2. So after reading this, I'm under the impression that my brain is wired to think orgasms only come from porn, as that was how it was for many years, so by ceasing porn viewing AND having orgasms, I might just be reiterating that to my brain. Would it be good to try orgasming to no visual stimulation. Or to just avoid touching myself at all and avoid any artificial stimuli?
     
  3. Longtime27

    Longtime27 Fapstronaut

    117
    101
    43
    Hi Pete - i'm in a very similar boat to you. I've not attempted hard mode but most definitely wanted to achieve natural arousal (including the think test you mention), and most importantly to repress/forget the need for artificial stimuli to arouse/achieve orgasm. P-induced ED also here so keen to get rid of that out my life...

    Like you i've read a couple of stories, and casually browsed a few images along the way.

    From my experience so far, I have allowed myself M & O, providing that at no point have my eyes have relied on anything artificial (erotica i think still falls under that umbrella), or that my mind has not recalled scenes or images from porn (being aroused to your own thoughts only works if you're not calling porn-memory into the frame IMO).

    Soooo... my advice is that if you're continuing to fantasise using purely your imagination, and you're prepared to keep that way, I think allowing yourself an MO purely to imagination could be beneficial.

    Happy to chat via PM likewise - and congrats on making it +90 days!
     

Share This Page