Astonishing Secrets of Addictions.

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Achilleaus, Sep 20, 2021.

  1. Achilleaus

    Achilleaus Fapstronaut

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    I consistently keep on seeing multiple posts along the lines of “PMO Addiction is the devil’s work”, “I wish I didn’t have this addiction” etc etc.

    Many of us, myself included, just notice what the addiction is doing to us.

    But have we noticed what our addiction is doing for us?

    At the age of 14, I fell into this labyrinth of an addiction. Two years, for two long years I cried about my urges, why I fell into this trap and why has God cursed me, just a teenager, with this seemingly insurmountable problem.

    Many of us still feel the same way. But is it really torture? Is this really a curse?

    When I was 15 and unaware of my addiction, I was a very shy and unambitious kid. I was that guy whoalways used to hide in the shadows, my courage lost somewhere deep within me.
    I would get bullied, wasn’t popular at all with the girls. I couldn’t even speak with girls.

    One time, my friend offered me 10 bucks just to fucking say Hi to my crush who was sitting just in the next row.
    I couldn’t even do that. Fuck the 10 bucks, but what matters is if I couldn’t even say Hi due to the fear of discomfort, this will also fall into other parts of my life and I would live all my life hiding in the shadows.

    So, why the hell am I telling you all this? What’s the difference between TO and FOR?

    I’ll tell you.

    When I truly committed to overcoming this addiction, I realised I do not have to win over my urges. My addiction is only the sign of a shitty lifestyle that I was living, it was not the cause of it.

    I repeat, our addiction is the symptom of our shitty life, not the other way around.

    Once I realised this, I immediately started working on improving my lifestyle, or the addiction would take my life over (see Ted Bundy’s last interview)

    I went from being overweight at 20% Body fat to dropping and maintaining it at 10% body fat with lean muscle. I went from being paralysed by anxiety and not being able to say just one word to girls, to asking out girls then and there if I found them pretty. I went from an unambitious guy to establishing my first business even before I am of legal age to do so.
    I went from hiding in the shadows to confronting my shame and publicly declaring that I was addicted and needed help.

    I am not saying this to brag.

    I am saying this because, without my addiction, I never would have done those things. I never would have managed the drive to do such things.

    My addiction made me better. It gets me closer to my true self.

    So, I ask you, What has your addiction done for you?

    It's about time to change the way we perceive addiction.

    It’s our ticket, a god-sent personal, lifetime guide to becoming our best selves.

    Do not hate it.

    Listen to it, and get to a point where you no longer need it to guide you.

    You decide whether it’s a godsend or a devil’s curse.

    It's up to you.

    See you on the other side.


    References: The Gift of our Compulsions - Mary O Malley. Highly recommended
     
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  2. modernstore99

    modernstore99 Fapstronaut

    I agree that looking at the symptoms and consequences of our addictions, especially porn, is a fantastic tool in finding the motivation to escape them.

    My addiction made me spend hours wasting time I could be studying for exams that I ended up failing. It also made me unable to have sex with women I cared about, which them made feel incredibly bad.

    Find out what your addiction is replacing in your life. Do you not have friends, or a job, or any goals? Porn convinces you that you're winning the game of life, and leaves you completely unmotivated to do anything else.

    Find that areas of your life that are lacking or damaged by porn addiction, and use the tools from NoFap and YBOP to fix them
     
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  3. Beekind

    Beekind Fapstronaut

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    I get your point.
    You had the desire to be successful and to make something out of your life.
    The problem is that most people don't have this desire.
    They have to nourish it over a long period of time.
    This desire is behind your success, not Addiction.
    Addiction was the resistance that you had to overcome on your way.
     
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  4. Nugget9

    Nugget9 Fapstronaut

    People have to take personal responsibility for all actions in life. I have been, for the last couple of months, realizing I have had a good day. People know if they were a good person or a bad person at the end of the day. Lay your head on the pillow at the end of the day knowing you had a good day is the best feeling. People have to be self rewarding also as in know you did something, not God or something else, only YOU.
     
    HelperX likes this.
  5. HelperX

    HelperX Fapstronaut

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    Addiction did nothing for you and for anyone else in this world. What made you have a better life was the desire to have a better life, as Beekind said, not the addiction.

    Everyone needs to be strong and defeat this addiction and better their life.
     
  6. Achilleaus

    Achilleaus Fapstronaut

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    I agree with you all to an extent. But, IMO, if not for my addiction, I wouldn’t have realised that I was heading down the wrong path in my life.

    Our addictions are an indicator of our lifestyles, signalling constantly that we aren’t living upto our potential.

    Addiction, in and of itself, doesn’t necessarily mean good or bad. What matters is the context. What you do regarding your addiction, that’s what matters.

    Again, there’s always the dichotomy.

    What I wanted to really convey is to be grateful for your addiction, since it made you realise that you have a major problem.

    Realise it, and act against it.
     
  7. HelperX

    HelperX Fapstronaut

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    Lol, you are talking like that because you don't know what other people went through in their addiction.

    I'll never be grateful for fucking porn addiction. It caused me problems, it didn't made me realise shit, I realised all of the things I know about my brain and my life, myself. Porn just caused negativity in my life. I was the one who had to fight constantly for my life and better it, because I wanted to save myself from this shit. I'm the only one who I should be grateful to, me, myself.

    Beware when posting threads like this, you might trigger people because I repeat, you don't know what others have been through. Saying, for exmaple, that a person who doubted his sexuality due to porn should be thankful to his/her porn addiction, is very wrong or saying that a person who has his life destroyed by porn addiction that he should be thankful for it, is very wrong as well.

    You think that it helped you, fine, your view of seeing things. I believe that it was detrimental for me, because it really was. And it is detrimental for everyone in this world, it was obviously detrimental for you too, but you then decided what to do with your life.
     
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