could you advise me ?

today is the fourth day for me, and every day once I wake up before even getting out of bed I find myself had an intrusive picture from a certain pornographic film in my mind although the sexual part is blurred. but I still have these thoughts which is disturbing me a lot and makes me energyless and can't even do my daily basis. so today, I searched for the name of this fucking actor to see any other picture for him normal picture not a pornographic one in order to replace the picture with another picture, and while I was surfing ugly ordinary pictures I got hit by my cover under me ( I was still in bed), so I felt with blood flow to my lower part, to find my head saying that I had this feeling because I'm a gay. but because I know I'm not gay and I had this kind of OCD before it didn't persist for too long only a few minutes. but the problem is I'm afraid to have a gay dream because it happened to me before. in addition to pedophilic gay dream and pedophilic dream. which makes me hate myself more and more. and I started to have thoughts about relapse today in order to avoid these thoughts more, but I know if I opened the usual film it will be hard not to watch any other film, and when I open it I won't be able to get out of the site easily. and I can't control anything anymore.