Curiosity about fleshlight

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by tsukiyumio, Nov 11, 2019.

  1. tsukiyumio

    tsukiyumio Fapstronaut

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    Hello, I'm a 20 years old virgin, I think that some of you can relate to my situation.

    5 months ago when I managed to sworn off porn, I discovered something : fleshlight. Unlike porn, escort and sex toys are new territories to me but I prefer sex toy cuz things like Herpes, etc...
    I was curious what it felt like so I went off to buy one but then it all spiraled down from there. Once I masturbated to it, I discovered that this thing is ruining the progress that I've made so I threw it off.

    Then somehow my mind is bombarding me with stuff like : " wait wait wait how about that fleshlight modeled after that porn star, it looked sick"

    Naturally I am curious again and then the same thing happen. Again.

    Now I am curious once again about another fleshlight model, and this curiosity made me want to watch how other guys use it, which leads me to porn....

    .........

    The thing is I am used to porn and I know what it felt like to be trapped in there but with this new obsession, I feel like a mouse being lured to a trap.

    Naturally I reset my badge but the bigger question is : How do I crush this curiosity ? If any of you have any idea that would be great.
     
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  2. Chefb87

    Chefb87 Fapstronaut

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    Research the term " three circle " and then make your own. You need to define your addiction, and define your recovery. And get your " measuring stick out " with most decisions you make in your life. And ask yourself the question ... Does this bring me closer to the healthy lifestyle I want, it does it bring me closer to relapse.

    For me with 205 days into recovery. I have not once masterbated. I deleted me Facebook , I deleted my snapchat. I don't watch any sexual movies or TV or YouTube. I didn't go to a public beach at all this past summer. You need to figure out your triggers. And I find the three circles does a great job. You put your boundaries and what you consider dangerous and a relapse on paper. So if you're addictive thinking is trying to convince you that flashlights aren't bad. .. well if it's on your three circles you obviously put it there for a reason at once point.
    I hope this helped !
     

  3. Best thing you can do is ditch the porn and masterbation and go find a real woman with a real vagina.

    A fleshlight feels nothing like the real thing!

    That being said, MOing with a fleshlight and not to p0rn is still a lot healthier as you're using physical sensation as opposed to straight visuals. Upto you of course, but each to their own. Just stay away from p0rn or using your hand!
     
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  4. Homelander

    Homelander Fapstronaut

    Do you want to be cured from your Porn Addiction?
    Then stop fucking a flesh light because its edging and will only drag you down.
    You are only allowed to have sex with a real woman.
     
  5. dankestmemes

    dankestmemes Fapstronaut

    This is exactly where I am right now. My nofap constraints allow viewing porn, masturbating, but no ejaculation unless it's inside a vagina.
     
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  6. athlean

    athlean Fapstronaut

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    you need to redefine nofap my man ;)
     
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  7. dankestmemes

    dankestmemes Fapstronaut

    I don't know any other communities besides this one that fit my goals. NoFap was the closest. As I said to another user, I don't have a porn problem. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think everyone here has to have serious issues to be part of this community.
     
  8. tsukiyumio

    tsukiyumio Fapstronaut

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    Hmm real woman huh...
    I'm not a social butterfly so that can be a hurdle.
    The thought of speaking with someone that I don't know is unpleasant, to say the least
     
  9. Dinesh The Survivor

    Dinesh The Survivor Fapstronaut

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    Shift your attention towards your hobbies or your goals. Worrying about the problem will leads to think more about the shit toy you used and can ruin your Nofap journey. If you are still young in terms of your age, don't worry about you getting girls. The right girl will come in your life in the right time. Use your energy to do something meaningful in your life, it could be learning something new everyday. Get out from your house and make some friends. And when i say friends, make sure they live a healthy lifestyle and avoid any sexual topics in your conversation. It is harder to avoid sexual thoughts because it's is natural. Any man will have sexual thoughts once in a while(it comes and goes only last for seconds before you take control of your thoughts), but if you have it all day long, do something to clear your mind or seek someone's help. The urges you have can be a great motivation if you use it as a energy to work and other important stuff. Don't have to battle the pmo on your own, We fapstronauts are here for you. Peace.
     
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  10. tsukiyumio

    tsukiyumio Fapstronaut

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    Wonderful, thank you for the advice
     

  11. Exactly this for me! Saving my precious seed to go only where nature intended! (My wife!)
     
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  12. 1. It's good when you have NO porn addiction, my friend. And sure, you can be part of the Community nevertheless. But try not to trigger others or promote sexual fetishes.

    2. I still think you have a serious issue. Let me explain:
    You were curious, you bought a sex toy and you masturbated with it. No problem. Then it grew into a fetish (different kind of "shapes") and you got into a conflict. You couldn't solve this conflict with a clear decision but bought more sex toys only to throw them away because of guilt. Problem.

    Let me tell you one thing: A fleshlight is just a fleshlight. Forget about "fleshlights modelled after porn stars"! Female porn stars are not porn stars because their genitalias are somehow special. They're porn stars because they're willing to sell their bodies and able to do sexual acts in front of a camera team whenever they have to.
    Why should they be called "stars" anway?

    So you being a virgin searches for a way to simulate sex with a woman (or a porn star). I won't say it's impossible. In a way your brain "believes" that it has real sex. But in reality it will always just be you in a room playing with yourselve. And you'll know it.

    So either you wait for ultimate virtual reality (matrix style) or you put porn and fleshlights away for once and go out, looking for the real deal.
     
    tsukiyumio likes this.
  13. Also guys, just viewing porn without ejaculation won't solve anything.

    For me, a guy who does semen retention but volutarily spends his precious time and energy watching porn is just a laughing stock.
    Sorry if I'm being rude.
     
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  14. Demodectic

    Demodectic Fapstronaut

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    Reading this makes me want to go out and buy one. Although i did once buy a pocket pussy at the local Adult BookStore about 10 years ago and it was a green silicone but it was too short where the head of my wiener would stick out the top of it so on every stroke it was stimulating the top ridge and that was too sensitive.

    I threw it away after a couple of weeks. I remember one time I got drunk and then went to AdultBook and paid $400 for one of those vagina/ass lower torso. It was embarrassing buying it face-to-face in person.

    I ended up throwing it out because the vagina hole and the a-hole became one hole (after it was worn out I mean). But in general I dont like to keep those around because if your girlfriend or housecleaner finds it......How embarassing
     
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