D
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Guest
Hi dear community!
I have started using this forum to get rid of my femdom porn habit. I would like to share with you my history. I am not sure but maybe there is some spoiler. I would try to announce it.
The first memory I have doing kinky stuff was when I was very young.
All these experiences was very young and before any porn contact.
Once internet arrived to my life as a teenager I started to watch a lot of femdom porn for hours. I used to edging for hours. Then, I progressively started watching more hardcore stuff. To sum up, let say, from foot fetish to BDSM, pegging, water games, even scat...
I wasn't able to realize that I have a problem until I have difficulties to get and erection with girls. With regular partners was most of the time ok, but with new girls was not good. Probably because a mix of anxiety and lack of interested in regular sex and desensitized because of porn. However I never linked this to my masturbation habit. I was able to separate from my femdom fantasies at home to my sexual life with girls. I can't remember exactly how I arrive to this and reboot site. But I read some of Nofap blogs and there was a clink. Of course I was ruining my sexual life because of my addiction!
Then I decided to make something with this. It was too much pain and shame because of my dysfunctional erection. I started to take some supplements as L-Arginine to do a better perform during intercourse. And most important, I stopped watching any kind of porn. But the reality was that it wasn't so easy. From time to time I have a big urge to masturbate watching femdom videos. I was able to develop will power during some weeks or months but I always finish reading some more vanilla stuff as info about chastity, or info about prostate massage... which lead me to watching femdom porn.
Some years ago, I was dating a girl with whom we made a lot of femdom stuff. It was great, and I enjoyed, but at the same time I felt it wasn't right. Because we chat a lot by the internet too, I stopped watching porn. However I didn't realize it was another way of satisfying my addiction. Finally I broke up because of this and other matters. The point is that because this was "real" experiences I find my self thinking about it and my mind start to become difficult to control.
Nowadays I have another couple and I am really happy with her. We do some control games but not to much into femdom. We also change roles. For me is perfect because I don't want to go ahead but at the same time I have some domination fun. Here I send a open question because I don't know if this is correct. I mean, On one hand I think there is not nothing bad with any sexual desire as long as it doesn't become and addiction. I have to admit that all this fetish/kinky/domination desires are in me since I was a child or knew about the term of femdom. On the other hand, because of my addiction is difficult to just enjoy them freely without any "second effect". I doubt that if this is on my because of my nature or any really young experience I can just get rid of it. Or maybe yes?
Currently my porn femdom habit is keep on track but not free of it. I can be without watching for weeks or months and I cant remember but it was a long time since I don't ejaculate or edge. The last period I didn't watch or read anything related to femdom was one month (until yesterday). I was able not to masturbate.
I don't know if I will be able some day to get rid this desires of domination and humiliation. With any doubt my erection problem is better when I don't masturbate or see porn.
If you have any tip, experience or word to share, I was grateful to listen to.
I edit it because I forget to write about the positives steps an what help me. I meditate daily twenty minutes, I do yoga two times per week, I love to travel by bike, I love to be with friends, I have a strong confidence. I have also download a habit's app trying to keep me on control.
I have observed that the problem comes when I spent too much time working on the computer and I am bored and I have had some mental fantasies before. Then I become weak...
I have started using this forum to get rid of my femdom porn habit. I would like to share with you my history. I am not sure but maybe there is some spoiler. I would try to announce it.
The first memory I have doing kinky stuff was when I was very young.
Probably I was 6 years old?? I remember proposing to my neighbour (another young girl) trampling me while I was holding a big book with my stomach. After that I remember that my primary teacher invite us to smell our feet at night (probably she has a foot fetish too LOL). after that I remember smelling dirty girls pants in the toilet, smelling girl shoes and drinking my own pee.
Once internet arrived to my life as a teenager I started to watch a lot of femdom porn for hours. I used to edging for hours. Then, I progressively started watching more hardcore stuff. To sum up, let say, from foot fetish to BDSM, pegging, water games, even scat...
I wasn't able to realize that I have a problem until I have difficulties to get and erection with girls. With regular partners was most of the time ok, but with new girls was not good. Probably because a mix of anxiety and lack of interested in regular sex and desensitized because of porn. However I never linked this to my masturbation habit. I was able to separate from my femdom fantasies at home to my sexual life with girls. I can't remember exactly how I arrive to this and reboot site. But I read some of Nofap blogs and there was a clink. Of course I was ruining my sexual life because of my addiction!
Then I decided to make something with this. It was too much pain and shame because of my dysfunctional erection. I started to take some supplements as L-Arginine to do a better perform during intercourse. And most important, I stopped watching any kind of porn. But the reality was that it wasn't so easy. From time to time I have a big urge to masturbate watching femdom videos. I was able to develop will power during some weeks or months but I always finish reading some more vanilla stuff as info about chastity, or info about prostate massage... which lead me to watching femdom porn.
Some years ago, I was dating a girl with whom we made a lot of femdom stuff. It was great, and I enjoyed, but at the same time I felt it wasn't right. Because we chat a lot by the internet too, I stopped watching porn. However I didn't realize it was another way of satisfying my addiction. Finally I broke up because of this and other matters. The point is that because this was "real" experiences I find my self thinking about it and my mind start to become difficult to control.
Nowadays I have another couple and I am really happy with her. We do some control games but not to much into femdom. We also change roles. For me is perfect because I don't want to go ahead but at the same time I have some domination fun. Here I send a open question because I don't know if this is correct. I mean, On one hand I think there is not nothing bad with any sexual desire as long as it doesn't become and addiction. I have to admit that all this fetish/kinky/domination desires are in me since I was a child or knew about the term of femdom. On the other hand, because of my addiction is difficult to just enjoy them freely without any "second effect". I doubt that if this is on my because of my nature or any really young experience I can just get rid of it. Or maybe yes?
Currently my porn femdom habit is keep on track but not free of it. I can be without watching for weeks or months and I cant remember but it was a long time since I don't ejaculate or edge. The last period I didn't watch or read anything related to femdom was one month (until yesterday). I was able not to masturbate.
I only did some strokes. But I spent a lot of time watching, pinch my nipples and massage my prostate.
I don't know if I will be able some day to get rid this desires of domination and humiliation. With any doubt my erection problem is better when I don't masturbate or see porn.
If you have any tip, experience or word to share, I was grateful to listen to.
I edit it because I forget to write about the positives steps an what help me. I meditate daily twenty minutes, I do yoga two times per week, I love to travel by bike, I love to be with friends, I have a strong confidence. I have also download a habit's app trying to keep me on control.
I have observed that the problem comes when I spent too much time working on the computer and I am bored and I have had some mental fantasies before. Then I become weak...
