Honestly does the craving for a gf every subside while single ?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Kman20, May 14, 2019.

  1. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    Yes I understand this, honestly though what held me back wasn’t the fear of being rejected by her in terms of non platonic persists but just speak to her was my fear. I wasn’t scared that i wouldn't get her number or a date, that would kind of suck yeah but it wasn’t what was holding me back.

    If I had gone up and talked to her and if she said no to me, I would easily still count that as a win. This is because lately in my life I haven’t been socializing much. If that makes sense.
     
  2. Daniel Forster

    Daniel Forster Fapstronaut

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    Turbo Chad? Haha' Hell no, I'm quite a nerd - not even close a Chad - I just that have a car (a old one actually), take care of my appereance (just workout), go to the college and I try to talk to girls and ask them out, you just have to be out there and not in your room. All of my girlfriends I met online, you just need some good photos.
     
  3. Daniel Forster

    Daniel Forster Fapstronaut

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    Well, I go where I fell confortable to be -that's important, so you need to expand you confort zone if you try to approach a girl you need to be confortable with the place, for example nightclubs, its a a good place (The girls are drunk, loud sound, low light, and a lot of girls just wanting to kiss someone, you may not find a gf there but will acquire lots of experience), but you have to be confortable like its a normal thing to you to go to nightclubs, after that you start to think about asking a girl there. But look, anyplace it's a good place to met girls, just take action. But before all of this, are you ok with yourself? Do you look at the mirror and say - hey im not that bad? If not, you should work on yourself first, and rest will happen naturally, trust that.
     
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  4. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    Lol I probably won’t make online dating my main means to meeting girls to date but that’s cool that it worked out for you so successfully.

    You’re right, I’ve always just sat at home and focused on myself hoping someone to come along but how the hell could that even work ??? It’s like trying to find the new iphone in an Amish town.
     
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  5. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    I see, I was thinking the book club and the stores at the mall that I like to go to as places right now.

    Yeah I think I’m pretty damn good looking, I’m no Christ Hemsworth but I’m sexy in my own right. I’m only 130 pounds but still I’m a lot better than I used to be man.
     
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  6. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    We been spending most our lives
    Living in an Amish paradise

    -Weird AL
     
  7. Daniel Forster

    Daniel Forster Fapstronaut

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    You are right, online dating isnt the best way (it takes a long time and often the girls you find live far from you), but having a good presence on social medias helps a lot, the first thing a girl will do to know you better is search your facebook or instagram. Exactly, you need to be where the girls are!
     
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  8. Daniel Forster

    Daniel Forster Fapstronaut

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    Good! The hardest part is to be Ok with yourself, but you are good to go! Just like I told you, every place is good place to meet girls, I just mentioned nightclubs because is where a girl go to meet guys (not all girls). But anyplace you go is better than just stay at you room Haha' In a nutshell the more girls you talk to, higher are your chances to find someone.
     
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  9. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    Very true man. I have an instagram but damn it is dry. I think girls would find it creepy or weird if you didn’t have any social media at all. I will work on my instagram but I won’t be making it fake.
    Like I’m not going to make it seem like I have that crazy life when I don’t.
     
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  10. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    I was also thinking in the mindset of, where the kind of girl that I’d LIKE to date be hanging out at? Would she be at the club? At a gaming store ? Shows their interest you know.
     
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  11. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    Dammit.
     
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  12. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    It makes you seem like a weirdo if you don’t have a presence on media.
     
  13. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    I think social media is a waste of time. Most of it is fake / staged / trying to convince others of something / exaggerated version of your life.

    I tell people who ask me for mine (I don't have any) that if they want to get to know me or communicate with me, then talk to me, be a part of my life, or at the very least use the phone.

    I don't see it as weird. I see it as screening out people who aren't really interested in making the effort to get to know me. I don't make it convenient for others to creep my life.

    It's not a bad thing to be different from everyone else. To be mysterious and unpredictable. To stand out. If that's weird, then I'm weird.
     
  14. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    Yep I understand your mindset. However, I do not find it as a complete waste of time. There are real connections that can be made through social media. With this it is really about how you USE IT.

    Sure a lot of people try to “out lifestyle” each other on SM. But I wouldn’t call it a waste of time and completely distancing yourself from it could be a wasted opportunity. You could use it to better connect to people with pictures and videos that aren’t about showing off. Rather than having the mindset of “I’m going to show off how great my life is” “ I’m going to share this with my friend because I think it’d give him a laugh”.

    Also if you are genuine with your SM instead of being fake with it there is an opportunity to make authentic relationships. For example, if you like to draw or hike and so you post pictures of drawings you’ve done or trails you’ve gone on and someone sees your profile and you start talking. Next thing you know you’ve made a friend. Then you could even plan to meet up and hangout.

    Social media in itself isn’t bad. It could be used to strengthen, build, and create relationships. It is just that the vast majority may not be using it for this reason whether they’re conscious of it or not.
     
  15. Daniel Forster

    Daniel Forster Fapstronaut

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    You are right! In my opinion the best way to use instagram is posting photos of you doing thing you like, because this way you atract girls with the same mindset of yours, rising the probably of finding a perfect gf for you! I guess you should make you instagram interesting, for example I into hacking, I can post photos of me watching Mr. Robot or a photo o me at def con, now let's think of a girl into hacking (She may not be a hacker, just like these stuff) which one will pick up her interest? Now, we need some empathy here, put yourself into her skin, which guy would be more interesting? One which stay in his room watching series or the one at def con?
     
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  16. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    Exactly man, if you aren’t using social media to be fake then it’s only benefitting you.
     
  17. Anubis Rises

    Anubis Rises Fapstronaut

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    so even after 500 plus days nofap the desire to be with a mate is still there,so your saying its gonna bother me till the day i die ,
     
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  18. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    Depends on the person I think. Maybe it’s just biology. We pmo because we want affection and a partner and to feel good but we don’t want to go out and go into the real world to do that because we’re scared to. That craving has never left me but it did weaken but now I’m going about it in the right way. By finding girls in real life. It won’t bother you if you go out and try to find someone. We want what we can’t have. If we go out and experience we’ll be able to feel like we can meet women.
     
  19. TrueSaiyan

    TrueSaiyan Fapstronaut

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    I've been thinking the same thing actually. One of my friends has said woman look for a man who either has a good job or has there own place or is high status? I'm starting to believe it. I watched my co worker get a girlfriend in not even the first month of work when he started. I've been working for well over a year and I haven't been able to attracted a girlfriend or anything. I just got rejection a while back...
     
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  20. Daniel Forster

    Daniel Forster Fapstronaut

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    You are right in you line of thought, but I'm curious, do you only want a GF or just hanging out with some girls would be ok to you too?
     
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