I don't care anymore, I'm making myself free from other people. Focusing on my Purpose

Ahhh...don't know what to say as I am experiencing it already. But I stopped thinking about that for the fact that people may be doing something important and genuine to make both ends meet. Like, what they are doing out of surviving Life's Challenges, that's why they take less interest.
I was feeling the same today and came here to post a thread. But ill not because I think I will get normal after a day انشاءاللہ. All that matters is that we should "Learn to Accept" something that is truth(it gave me a little relief today). Because if we complain against something that shouldn't be complained we are just wasting our time. I used to feel better after laughing and making some jokes u know but for 2 days I smile and laugh and then again mental distress. People think including my mother that I laugh to much and im not serious with life. People actually care but sometimes they are not willingly there to leave their business (anything) and then talk to others. Ahh.. yes it is true what we want is not guaranteed to be the answer. Sometimes we just need to fight with the basics that we miss in our lives for example, having our responsibilities neglected, lack of interest in job, having a talk with parents, having an exercise for health concerns etc like not studying (i didn’t want to mention it but kia karein jo hai wo museebat hai ab haqeeqat) Hope you will not mind, sometimes I write in roman urdu as i can't say that in Eng like emotions hote Yr...
BTW @SirQwerty this is reality but it's also a fact that telling someone our pain reduces it but we should not mention that as we don't have one...("one " in the halal sense).
Ahh..I'm myself feeling like vomiting and mental distress cause i quarreled even with one of my AP... but what he said afterwards was motivating, he said "I bet you that I'll not relapse if im genuinely sincere and you as well if you're genuinely a better version of what we are debating over here". So that's it, if there is a comfort and ease there is also stress and anxiety.
But I tell you one day I went to a guest house at 17 and staying there was not enjoyable instead i did that reminding myself that it's just a guest house and we are guests here. I'll go one day, what matters and who cares?
So, may we live this world working on ourselves lonely. And aslo like, ohhh I just forgot what I was about say....this is happening with me as well. I forget suddenly...makes it difficult to manage at job as well.
So, want to say what we see is not the reality and what is reality, we don't see.
Ahh...I'm feeling pain and stress in the head and also like vomiting but if I share this with my father you know what he'll say me, You go drink more water. And I say, yes my honours, I'll and happy ending.
Study is stress. P is stress. Loneliness is stress. People around also lead to stress. Health is a stress. Mental health is a stress. Some other factors are a stress. Sometimes I think like What the hell this is.
Neither I wish to drink water nor I can say my parents to arrange my marriage. Like i don't wanna use those words but yes, it sucks. Because marriage also needs somethings to be fixed first.
Everything will be alright. OK u don't worry. This happens. I'll try to accomplish the promise I made yesterday to do study after 9 PM so you can also do one for yourself.

 

@SirQwerty, I like your perspective, seek to understand rather than be understood- that's gotta be a fundamental building block of a fulfilling life. It also brings the ball into your own court, since we don't have much control over others and their thoughts and actions anyway, we might as well focus on what we can control, which is our own awareness, what we choose to focus on, and subsequent action therefrom.

That said, nothing has been more clear to me in my striving for sobriety over the last few years than the fact that we need other people in our lives. As much as I've tried to convince myself that I'm a lone wolf out here, the truth shows through again and again that I'm just a better person when I'm participating in this life thing with others.

I think you've got a wonderful perspective that if more people adopted would lead to a way better world. But I do hope you don't stop paying attention for opportunities to connect. We are disjointed and isolated and lonely now more than ever, which means that it takes more work than ever to connect, but it also means that there are many out there that deep down can very much relate to how ya feel (like mehself!).

Aight, I'll stop rambling now, good luck doing good work out there good sir; onward

 

This…this is the way. Embrace the hermit.
I don’t know where you live but life in an industrialized/ and or Western landscape is highly unnatural. Mutual reciprocity is the basis for many social organizing methods but it’s corrupted in these landscapes. Everyone has two faces and none of the guts to properly sever relationships they didn’t bother to form anyway. Ever called you friends wanting hang out and they can’t, only to see on another platform their having a kickback? Yep. Or you try and reach out to someone only for them to brush you off.

And I assure it’s not a personal or moral failing. I’m positive you look presentable and aren’t a hygienic disaster as some might insinuate upon reading your declaration.
Remember, lions may be social hunters but tigers are bigger and deadlier.

 

Cheer up!
I think we could start with the book and the sports, just see them as our frends.

 

Size isn't everything, a lion will only spend a fraction of his life in a pride, from the moment they are expelled they must hunt all by themselves all manners of preys including buffalos, rhinos, hippos, elephants etc while constantly fighting other lions for dominance and access to females. Even after they get a pride the fighting only increase as now all newcomers try to challenge them, adult lions usually last only about a couple of years before a younger ones expel/kill them, but while they have a pride with other adult males they are a force of nature, like the mapogo coalition.

 

Im really surprised seeing someone who thinks almost exactly like me, even glad in a weird sense. But at the same time i can't help but encourage you to not completely give up on other people. There are people like you and even though you mostly see them online (like here) there is a good chance id say you can find someone like that irl if you live in a medium to large sized town or near one. Only it will be tough to find them if you rarely go out and when you do are closed off to potential new friendships. I know it's easy to be dissapointed by failed efforts but they are efforts all the same and you can view them as experience instead of wasted time and energy. Personally i've also been socially anxious for most of my life, and only recently after having a few solid streaks have i seen my positivity and confidence pick up, so that's what giving me hope to continue this journey and self improvement in general