I hate hate hate close calls...

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Deleted Account, Nov 21, 2017.

  1. Was writing my book tonight and there was a part in it that had a trigger (nothing sexual, was just a weird dialog that gave me an urge).

    So I started looking at promiscuous images on Bing. It was getting worse and worse before I finally just shut the computer and walked away.

    One thing that amazes me... it doesn't matter how long you've been fighting this, or how many times you've relapsed... when the temptation hits, all logic and reasoning seems to go out the window. You literally have to slap yourself to escape the dopamine rush. Ridiculous.

    Not resetting the counter since it was such a short period of time and I walked away before it got out of control, but way to friggen close for comfort.
     
  2. chinatown117

    chinatown117 Fapstronaut

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    I think that speaks volumes about your resolve. Okay so yeah, a moment of weakness - we've all been there - but hats off to you for having the strength to slap yourself and walk away! Don't reset the counter - this is an overall win for you! Which 72 days - that's awesome, wow!
     
  3. Inactive User

    Inactive User Fapstronaut

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    Nice job man. Keep it up and stay away from anything that might tempt you. I know it's hard to stay on track after close calls like that. I was having close calls for days until tonight when I failed. I even told someone I wasn't going to do it, but I did. Super frustrating—so don't let that happen. You can do it!
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Thanks Xigwon, that's really encouraging. Don't worry about the fall, just means you'll be that much stronger the next time!
     
  5. Inactive User

    Inactive User Fapstronaut

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    Thanks Jack! Will do. I'm going for 28 days no PMO and then will set a longer goal after that.
     
  6. vxlccm

    vxlccm Fapstronaut

    It got a little easier for me after 365. Problem was the lifelong habit? Anyway, it kept getting easier after the long gaps, 90-streaks, 365-streaks before my 40+ years. Now with a sold few years in, definitely not so urgent. However, when a psub is in front of me, there is a siren call... and I remain disgusted that there is a temptation to it. It just is what it is, though. I have my life and it has it's illusion world with a veneer over the death within. My life is alive, now :)
     
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  7. ruco

    ruco Fapstronaut

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    Congrats for not giving in. Once I start browsing sensual images it’s all down hill from there. You resisted! Great job
     
  8. Tryingto

    Tryingto Fapstronaut

    Congrats for walking away @Jack Harper.

    A truly inspiring tale - keep up the good work.
     
  9. Exponential Power

    Exponential Power Fapstronaut

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    Great job walking away! Recognizing dangerous behavior is a sign of recovery. By stopping you've strengthened your power to fight the addiction. Experiences like this is part of the brain's learning process. I had a close call a few days ago I almost M'ed without P. I was worrying and allowed myself to fantasize. I only stopped because I don't want to go back to day 0. Now I'm dealing with my emotions and recommitted to controlling my thoughts. Good call keeping your counter. Resetting would give you an excuse to binge.
     
  10. Tryingto

    Tryingto Fapstronaut

    Great observation! Great affirmation!

    Every time we stop, we strengthen our non-pmo muscles and create different pathways in the brain. All of which enhances - but importantly does not guarantee - our ability to do the same next time.
     
  11. I also had a close call today. I was on the verge of M'ing, the urges persisted through the day but I resisted it everytime.

    Props @Jack Harper! Happy you didn't give in :)
     
  12. thanks for all the responses guys, had another close call this morning. I think a lot of it is the chaser effect from being intimate with my wife.

    P and M are the worst...
     
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